Helena S SDE
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Experience description:

In 2017, after returning from the vet where Crystal (cat) had been treated for renal failure, she hid behind an armchair against the wall, where it was dark and quiet.  At around 19.30 in the evening I looked down over the chair to see how she was and saw a golden light around her.  People will say that this could have caused a string of associations, but somehow I immediately knew that she was automatically growing a connection to somewhere.  It was just happening.  That somewhere was up and to the right of us.  At the same time I felt an excitement in that somewhere, akin to an expectant maternity ward and had the thought  'coming home'.  It felt warm and happy there but at the same time I felt that it was forbidden territory to me.  When I try to think back if they were human in that somewhere I just get confusion.

From somewhere in the middle of my head I 'saw' that this connection was a beam of brilliant white light with sparks round the outside.  Like a super super bright firework.  Some of the sparks close to the entrance of that somewhere were orange, maybe because the whole thing was engulfed in the golden light.

Unfortunately, I fight to the bitter end for my cats and ended up taking her to emergency.  They phoned me around 2.00 to say that she was not breathing very well.  I immediately went there and she was heartbreakingly put to sleep.  I think that what I was shown was her way of saying that she wanted to die at home.  I never learn!

Crystal, with Coral, were left behind cats after a lady living in the area moved away.  With the help of a charity we caught them and they were eventually brought home to me.  I kept them even though I actually knew where this lady had moved to, because in my mind's eye  I kept seeing a horrific situation.  Without giving too much detail because of the potency of words,  I saw the said lady bending over a certain cat with a knife .  Approx a year later we heard that this lady had committed suicide by stabbing herself first in the stomach and then the throat.

Just to mention that six months before Crystal passed on I had a premonition that something would be happening at that time.  I have premonitions around death now and then as well as sense presences although I am definitely not psychic.  It all seems to be controlled from the 'other side'.  Last year I had another premonition that something would happen in the middle of August 2020 and even told my neighbour at the beginning of the year.  She said not to think about it otherwise it would come true.  During May I could see that mid August was stretched out to the last week in September.

During the first week in August my other cat Sparkle was taken ill.  The night before she went to the vet I had a dream that I did not feel happy about.  It started off like my usual  dreams that are very dark, talking to people in narrow passages and tunnels. We went up some steps to the left and I entered a room.  Suddenly a man switched on the light and I exclaimed 'that's nice'.  It was a golden light and I thought of the light around Crystal.  I turned around to see the room.  It had white painted bricks, no windows and the right side was like a black fog or blacked out.  At the front of the room on the far side from where I entered there was a glass door and all along the front was a very low podium where the man stood.  The ceiling was made of glass and a diffused light beam shone on top of the golden light.  The effect of the light tinted the walls with a hint of green.

The small man, around late thirties/forties, had a round smiley jolly face, suntanned, slightly rough skin and was balding on top with blondish curly hair around the sides.   He was wearing a light green shirt, a wide tan belt and brown trousers and was talking about Sparkle to me and someone unknown in the dark doorway I had come through.  I thought I knew this man then I thought this must be St. Francis.  I have since looked up pictures of St. Francis and he was nothing like the man in my dreams.  There was a definite feeling that this man was looking after animals.

As I was turning around everything blacked out for a couple of seconds and I felt disengaged and cold.  I can't remember what the man was saying although afterwards I was sure he was saying that Sparkle couldn't go home, I could not have her but she would be fine?  Then the person in the blacked out area he was talking to glided into view and it was my passed on father who seemed to change into someone else.  By this time I was waking up.  I did not feel good about this dream.  I felt that by saying the room was nice I was giving consent and thought that the light was not bright enough for Sparkle and could not remember properly what he said...which home did he mean?

I fought for her life for two months.  On the Friday evening 21.00 before she passed on my mother was in a half dream state and suddenly turned to the left then her right side looking up saying  'the window is open'.   She had felt a draft on her right shoulder and dreamed of an open window with daylight.  All the curtains and windows were closed.  I knew what that meant.  In the early hours I got a phone call from the vet (again!) that my beloved Sparkle was not doing well.  We buried her the next day and later realized that it was animal day, St. Francis' day. 

A few yrs ago,  a couple of days after another cat, Gem,  passed on, a flock of around fifty birds flew and settled in our garden.  The first and only time this has ever happened as we hardly get any birds in the garden.  Gem loved to jump high, all over the place and I used to call her my birdie.

I believe that loosh, an energetic energy mostly made from suffering, is created here on this earth. Its purpose to feed another energetic being.

I am now reading the Michael Newton book about lives between lives where regressed people say they must reincarnate to learn lessons.  Sometimes it seems to me that they are cajoled into consent to come here and suffer.  Many souls who suffer in past lives report that they suffer even more because they can not come to terms with what happened to them.  Some then go into healing areas after which they are ready for more 'lessons'.  Many NDEers who do not want to come back are forced to.  Thus my belief in loosh.  The big question is why do we need to learn anything if we are part of a perfect God?

 Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?      No     

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words?          No     

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event? Yes    Crystal had renal failure, Sparkle was to visit the vet the next day.

 What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience?    normal

            Was the experience dream like in any way?  only the dream about Sparkle

 Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?   No     

What emotions did you feel during the experience?          Neutrally, peacefully interested and observing with Crystal's experience and worried after the dream about Sparkle.

 Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises?         no

 LOCATION DESCRIPTION:  Did you recognize any familiar locations or any locations from familiar religious teachings or encounter any locations inhabited by incredible or amazing creatures?         No     

Did you see a light?        Yes    A golden light around Crystal with her connection being a really bright beam with sparks around it.  In the dream I saw a golden light with a diffuse beam of light shining on top of it.

 Did you meet or see any other beings?         Uncertain          Only in my dream.

 Did you experiment while out of the body or in another, altered state?         No     

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No     

Did you notice how your 5 senses were working, and if so, how were they different? Yes    same like normal

 Did you have any sense of altered space or time?  No     

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?         Yes    I knew that Crystal was growing a connection to some other dimension.  It was happening automatically, naturally without effort. I also knew that she was warmly expected in that place where I was forbidden. Meanwhile I had it in my mind that the vets would treat her successfully.

 Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?           No     

Did you become aware of future events?      No     

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience? No     

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?     No     

How has the experience affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices? Career choices?   none

 Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience? No     

Have you shared this experience with others?       Yes          Sent emails to other researchers but got no response.

 What emotions did you experience following your experience? Assurance after Crystal passed on and worry after the dream.

 What was the best and worst part of your experience?     I was peacefully, neutrally observing Crystal's and worried after the dream about Sparkle.

 Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience? no

 Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?       No     

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?           Uncertain     I did not have an NDE so a lot of the questions are irrelevant.

 Please offer any suggestions you may have to improve this questionnaire.       Thank you for the site and all the work you put into it.  On my laptop, the questions do not display properly.  The letters are squashed on top of each other or disappear behind the boxes.  I had to guess half of it.