Experience description:

I was lying in bed awake when I 'saw' a black, ropy, roiling mass coming down toward me from a point at my upper left. It got larger and more menacing as it approached, and it had a fuzzy appearance, as if it was covered with hairs like the hairs on the legs of some spiders. It was all knotted up and roiling like a mass of snakes. I knew it wanted me--but then I knew it wanted a young student, Brenda (not her real name), who had seemed angry with me and my companions that afternoon. We had gone out to celebrate my last day of work at as a graduate assistant on a project at a university. We’d had pizza and beer, and I sensed she was very offended that we’d been drinking. (She didn’t say anything, but I assumed her demeanor toward us was because of that. She was normally pleasant, but that day very cold.) That night as the gnarly black thing came toward me, I knew that if could get me, it would have free access to Brenda. This was communicated to me clearly but without words. I just knew it.

As horrifying as this thing was, I knew I couldn't fight it off by myself, and that if I tried, it would win. So, baring my heart, I 'said' to the thing: 'Come on in and meet a Man.' This Man was Jesus Christ, I knew. Only He could win and save me--and Brenda. I 'felt' the thing sneering and trying to tell me that no, now I would be 'possessed,' that I was doing just what it wanted, letting it in. I had a moment of hesitation, but only a split second. I kept 'telling' it to 'Come in and meet a Man.'

At the moment when there should have been impact, the scene completely changed, and I was in a beautiful, bejeweled, bright, pearly white space. I've since called it a pavilion but that doesn't do it justice. It was changing and becoming beautiful in new ways. It was like a kaleidoscope of constant evolution of beauty--all of it in gorgeous textures and with glowing, precious gems.

I began to be aware of beautiful music. I couldn't tell if it had been there all along or if it was just now coming into my hearing. It was like a glorious symphony, but it may have been made of voices. I was trying to tell if it was instruments or voices, and I couldn't decide. I just knew it was the most beautiful music I'd ever heard. I was filled with wonder and a quiet joy. The music lasted longer than the visual imagery, but eventually both faded, and I was again aware of being in my bed. I can't remember if I thought any more about the sudden switch from darkness and fear to light and beauty and peace and joy, but I drifted off to sleep.

The next day I had to go back to the office. Patricia (my spiritual friend) and Brenda (the angry student) were there working. Patricia came out into the hall, looked at me, and said, 'Carol, your eyes! You've been seeing visions!' I said, 'What? No, I haven't.' But then I began to remember, and I said, 'No wait. Let me tell you what happened,' and I related the events to her. Then we went on into the office, and Brenda was like a different person. She was as pleasant and happy as she could be, even more so than before the event of the previous day. I could never understand why this amazing supernatural experience had a connection to this young person who was not a central figure in my life, although she had been a student of mine when I was teaching high school.  But that’s the way I understood it at the time.

At the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event?   No 

Was the experience difficult to express in words?  Yes     Hard to describe both the gnarly thing and how it communicated and even harder to describe the heavenly scene.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?      Hard to say--throughout.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness?      More consciousness and alertness than normal   Just very aware of all that was going on: the visual and auditory experience, and awe-struck by the beauty of it all.

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.   Because I was lying in bed, with my eyes closed, I didn't really have vision before the experience, but in the experience, I was aware of everything all around me.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.   Because I was lying in bed and the family was asleep, I wasn't hearing anything unusual before the experience. There was no sound when the gnarly thing approached, but in the heavenly realm I became aware of beautiful music and the 'strands' that made it up.

Did you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that your consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body?   No  

What emotions did you feel during the experience?   Joy, wonder, awe, and peace.  

Did you pass into or through a tunnel?   No  

Did you see an unearthly light?   Yes   I guess it could be described that way. The scene was just very light-filled. I was mainly noticing all the ways it was constantly changing. It was a bright, pearly white scene.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice?   I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin
The music may have been voices. It was impossible to tell if it was instruments or voices.

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)?   No  

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings?   No  

Did you become aware of past events in your life during your experience?   No  

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world?   A clearly mystical or unearthly realm
The 'white pavilion,' as described in the narrative.

Did time seem to speed up or slow down?   No

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything?   No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?   No

Did you come to a border or point of no return?   No

Did scenes from the future come to you?  No

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness suggesting that there either is (or is not) continued existence after earthly life (“life after death”)?   Uncertain   The experience was mystical, but I didn't think of 'after death.' I was just aware of something beyond what could happen in the earthly realm.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that God or a supreme being either does (or does not) exist?   Uncertain   The 'Man' I told the gnarly thing to come in and meet must have transported me, but I don't recall being aware of the prior, threatening experience while I was in the heavenly realm.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that you either did (or did not) exist prior to this lifetime?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that a mystical universal connection or unity/oneness either does (or does not) exist?   Uncertain   Again, this question is hard to answer. The experience was mystical but I'm not sure about the connection or oneness aspect.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life’s meaning or purpose?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life’s difficulties, challenges, or hardships?      

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding love?   Uncertain   I was in an atmosphere of love but it wasn't defined.

During your experience, did you encounter any other specific information / awareness that you have not shared in other questions that is relevant to living our earthly lives?   No  

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge or purpose?   No  

What occurred during your experience included:   Content that was entirely consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience   I'm so grateful to have seen for myself that the threats of evil are powerless against God, and that all I have to do is trust that God will fight my battles. My part is to have courage and not shrink in fear before the 'father of lies.' The beauty and dynamism of the heavenly realm, and the presence of wonderful music are very significant aspects of my view of the Beyond. Also, the experience showed me that my decisions and actions truly affect the lives of other people, even if I'm 'only' acting in the spiritual realm, because I strongly sensed that the experience had something to do with the student I've called Brenda.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience?   I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of th   Experience remains very vivid.

Discuss any changes that might have occurred in your life after your experience:   Hard to say, because I was already a believer in mystical experiences. In the narrative I explained that Patricia saw that I'd 'seen visions' and that 'Brenda' was friendly again, but this was not an experience that greatly changed my life at the time. Since then, I've shared it with a few people, and at least one said she was greatly helped by it.

My experience directly resulted in:   Unknown

Did you have any changes in your values or beliefs after the experience that occurred as a result of the experience?   Uncertain   My belief in mystical experiences was probably greater because of this.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience?   Uncertain   i pray for people for spiritual, emotional and physical healing, and have seen some results of those prayers, but I don't know if this experience has enabled me to be a clearer channel of healing or not.

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you?     As mentioned earlier, I believe that I affect the lives of other people, even if I'm 'only' acting in the spiritual realm. I believe intercession is powerful and can be experienced in unusual ways.

Have you ever shared this experience with others?   Yes  I shared the experience the next morning with my friend Patricia. I don't know when or if I would have remembered it if she hadn't said, 'You've been seeing visions.' That seemed to bring it back to me. After that, however, I think it was many years before I shared it with anyone again, and then it was just a few people over the years when it seemed like the thing to do. I've shared it with three spiritual advisors since then, trying to see if they could add any insights. After reading many NDE and NDE-like accounts on this website, I finally decided to share it here.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?   Uncertain   It's been 40 years since this happened, and if I had any knowledge of NDEs or NDE-like experiences, I don't remember it. I don't think I did, but I knew about visions and mystical trips to heaven such as the Apostle Paul alluded to in 2 Corinthians 12:2-4.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:   Experience was definitely real   There was no denying it. It happened!

What do you believe about the reality of your experience at the current time:   Experience was definitely real   I know it happened. Nothing more to say.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?   Uncertain   I just don't know what effect it had on my relationships, but I can't say it didn't have any effects.

Have your religious beliefs/spiritual practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?   Uncertain   The experience wasn't a huge turning point, but I'm very grateful to have had it. It's probably easier to believe in the reality of NDEs because I've had a similar experience.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience?   Uncertain   Dreams have sometimes taken me to another realm.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience?   Just that I'm grateful to have had it. Now that I've begun to read and listen to the NDEs, NDE-like experiences and OBEs of other people, I'm grateful I didn't have to have a life-threatening experience to give me a taste of the beauty of the Beyond.

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?   Uncertain   I don't think I can 'comprehensively' describe the experience in words.