Yvonne D's Experience

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Experience description:   

My experiences always start with a buzzing, electric feeling. I am very aware when this happens that I can lift my arm through my pillow or blanket and usually move my arm several times. If my arm feels light I know that I can lift myself. The buzzing and vibrating only lasts while I am still inside the body and stops immediately once I am fully floating. Initially I couldn't get out through my chest and went down or upwards to get out but now I know that I don't have a body, as I know it, in this state and just give a big push and I'm out. I have very little control over my movements in this state. I cannot feel gravity and am not aware of legs that can walk or arms that can pull.

Recently I have worked out that I can will myself in a direction but even this doesn't always work to plan. When I first leave I feel very conscious of what I am doing but it doesn't take long until I get distracted by things such as looking at doorways or furniture like I have never seen them before. Once I spent the entire time checking out the bottom trimmings on my wardrobe. I couldn't touch them no matter how hard I tried and I just seemed fascinated. It was like I had never seen them before. Another time I fell through the wall of the bedroom to the driveway and was fascinated by a sense of space.

Once I aimed for the doorway and then seemed to roll and got fascinated by the sense of rolling and couldn't stop. Once I return to my body I can go to the exact place where I got distracted and the object is very familiar even if I hadn't really ever looked at it before. While in the state I do not feel any familiarity or attachment. I remember looking down at myself once and my husband lying next to my body. I didn't feel love for him but I knew he belonged there. It's hard to describe the sensation of no pain, no feeling and no opinion. Just a sense of knowing but not the kind of knowing that we have in life. As soon as I become aware of my body I return to it. Sometimes with a jolt and other times I have just laid back down into it. I feel a fusing, tingling sensation when I return, as if I become aware that my blood is flowing.

Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?     No

But they do happen more often around menstruation. Usually when my body is tired but my mind is not.

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes

Yes, the sensations that are experienced do not have a word. For example, once I felt drawn by a light as I floated and the light seemed inviting and warm but I still felt danger. However, I didn't 'feel' as we know it. I can't describe the sensation that gave me so much insight about the light. It was just a knowing.

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          No

Far from it. I cannot do this when I am stressed.

What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience?           I am very aware of when I am doing it and very alert when I return. I don't feel that I am asleep and I am very sure that it wasn't a dream. Even after a nightmare I usually wake up drowsy or have difficulty returning to an alert rationale state. After whatever it is that I do my heart is usually racing and I am out of breath. I am very alert and often get out of bed and can hold a very rationale conversation. I recall everything that happened and it remains clear in my head for ever. Dreams become vague within an hour.

Was the experience dream like in any way?   In a dream I see the world as I see it in everyday life. I feel fear, anger etc. I can move as in life and I usually do things that I would in real life. In a dream I can appear at a park, a beach or even at work without having to get there. However, in the experience I do not feel emotions. In the experience I have to leave my body first and I have to get out of bed. I don't magically appear anywhere. I am where my body is and have to move myself to get somewhere.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Yes

Always a buzzing, electric, vibrating sensation and then I can lift myself. Initially I accidentally came out but now I am very aware of my actions. The vibrations are the moment I can lift. The buzzing is the start and the moment I become very aware of what is going to happen if I can stay relaxed.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            None that I can describe in human words. Perhaps a sensation of freedom and lightness. I get a sense of knowing but what it is that I know I am not sure of.

Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises?           Only the buzzing noise when it all starts. Twice I thought I heard a voice or a whisper but I cannot really say. I remember not liking it.

LOCATION DESCRIPTION:  Did you recognize any familiar locations or any locations from familiar religious teachings or encounter any locations inhabited by incredible or amazing creatures?            Uncertain

One of the very first times it happened I saw a light that was very inviting but for some reason I knew I couldn't go to it. I have never seen this light again.

Did you see a light?           Yes

Only the once. It was like a door of light that you could pass into. It was as if others were there but I just knew that it wasn't for me. I knew it was a good thing whatever it was but at the same time not a good thing for me.

Did you meet or see any other beings?           No

Only the whispering noise but I am unsure about this. I am very fearful of the idea that someone else could be sharing my experience and I went back immediately when I heard this noise - with the usual breathlessness.

Did you experiment while out of the body or in another, altered state? Yes

I always intend to go somewhere. When the buzzing starts I think to myself I will try to go out the front door but for some reason I cannot control what I do once I leave my body. I seem to get distracted. I don't feel a sense of attachment and my intentions get forgotten.

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No

I don't get very far. I remember feeling a cold sensation when I fell out into the driveway once. When I returned to my body and got up out of bed after the experience I noticed that it was frosty outside. I always know where I have been and can find the things that distracted me. Sometimes I never took notice of those things before and get surprised that I can recall every detail so well.

Did you notice how your 5 senses were working, and if so, how were they different?          Yes

The sense of touch was limited as I did not really have feet or fingers. Things always seem brighter. I can see in the dark which has always fascinated me but I don't see objects like I do when I am awake. I haven't been very aware of sound, smell or taste.

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   No, Not at all.

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    No

It's always as if I haven't lived. No attachment and no familiarity. It's as if you can't take your intelligence and memories with you. I had to relearn how to use my eyes in the state as initially I couldn't even control sight. Gravity is still an issue for me. The sense of knowing is confusing because I don't have the knowledge that I have acquired in life with me when I am in the experience. I have no memories.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?             No

Initially I found it difficult to get through my chest to get out but it is not an issue anymore. For some reason though I feel the need to move through a doorway even though I have proved time and time again that I can move through pillows, sheets and walls.

Did you become aware of future events?       No, Not at all.

Were you involved in or aware of a decision regarding your return to the body?       Yes

If I become aware of my body I return to it. I don't feel any emotion until I return gasping for air. I don't recall getting breathless but when I return I am very breathless and this scares me more than the experience.

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?         No

I do suffer from Deja Vu. I often do things that I have seen before in dreams. These things are not even predictable and often happen in places that I have never been to before and couldn't possibly know what they would have looked like.

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?   Yes

I fear that if I died and someone called out to me I would not feel attached enough to return. I like the idea though that I would not feel sadness, fear or loss. I believe that the state of death is similar to this and the state before life is similar to this. I now believe that there is something more to us than flesh.

How has the experience affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices? Career choices?       It hasn't affected anything.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?         No

But I am very curious about how real it is. I have read some of the stories on this website and while some are similar to mine others seem a little far fetched. I think there is a fine line between sleeping and whatever this is. The buzzing and vibrating sensation seems to be something that many of us experience which makes me think that perhaps it is real.

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes

Only immediate family. They probably think I've gone mad. They listen when I tell them about it all but they don't really comment. They, like me, are very rationale people. I would tell others perhaps if there was evidence that it is a real experience and not a mental condition. I don't know anyone else who does it. I have very practical friends and wouldn't even consider discussing it with them.

What emotions did you experience following your experience?  I feel scared about the breathlessness. Once that passes I feel like I have been somewhere and have the natural high that goes with going somewhere, if that makes sense.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      The best part is having control over the leaving my body. It feels good and light, both physically and emotionally. The worst part is waking up breathless.

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?        I have never been able to do it under the influence alcohol and I do not take drugs. I have to be very relaxed but not tired, otherwise I fall asleep. I cannot do it without the buzzing sensation first.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes

The questions were obviously devised based on research. They were very relevant to what happens.

Please offer any suggestions you may have to improve this questionnaire.    The questionnaire focuses on one off experiences. One would assume that if someone went to the trouble of looking for a website looking for answers that they have had many experiences. I knew the first time that I had a strange experience but it wasn't until it became a regular occurrence (over 15 years) that I became aware that it might be a real thing.