Wendy O's Experience

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Experience description:   

Around 1:30am I awoke in a cold sweat and felt nauseated. I attempted to walk to the bathroom and fell unconscious on the floor. I remember being picked up to a sitting position by my friend. After several minutes of sickness I felt a very strong sensation in my chest, as if a weight was sitting on my chest. As I lay in the bed waiting for the ambulance to arrive the entire room suddenly became white, not like the typical tunnel, but everything, all I could see was white everywhere. My body felt very light, almost weightless, as if I was leaving my body. I began to 'see' images from my life, not like the usual way one would visualize memories, more like really clear pictures from my life. I mostly saw images of my three children and some of my closest friends from over the years. During the images I kept switching between the whiteness/images and being in the room and every time I saw the room I kept telling myself "I'm not going to die." Then the ambulance arrived and I began trying to focus on the room and what they were doing to me and the images stopped and I felt my body again and all the pain...

Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?     No

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes

It is very hard to explain with words the type of emotions I felt during the experience

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          Yes

I had an alcohol induced myocardial infarction

What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience?           I was very aware of what was happening but I do feel that I was only semi-conscious. I was drifting in and out of semi-consciousness.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?   Yes, it very much felt like an awake dream.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Uncertain

During the time I felt weightless I only the white light all around me.

Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises?           not that I can recall

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?          No

Did you see a light?           Yes

I was surrounded by a white light, it is all that I could see

Did you meet or see any other beings?           No

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?    Yes

I began to 'see' images from my life, not like the usual way one would visualize memories, more like really clear pictures from my life. I mostly saw images of my three children and some of my closest friends from over the years.

I havent really had enought time to think through all of it enough to know just how much it has changed my life....I know I am living my life much more constrained than I did before....I think more about how my actions effect my physical body.

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?           No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   No

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No

Did you become aware of future events?       No

Were you involved in or aware of a decision regarding your return to the body?       Uncertain

When the ambulance techs entered the bedroom and started talking and touching me I decided to concentrate on what they were doing. I had to focus very hard to pay attention and answer their questions.I was very relieved to see them and felt that I would be okay now...I didnt feel that sense of dread anymore...

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?         No

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?   Yes

I am normally a very busy high-strung type of person but afterwards I am now much more laid back I dont worry or let everything get to me anymore. I think its more because I realize now how insignificant the little things in life really are, there are much more important things to consider in life than menial disagreements and what other people think.

How has the experience affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices? Career choices?       I dont feel as if making lots of money is so important anymore. I feel its more important to do what makes me happy. I have become more involved in the pagan community in my area now and I am spending much more time studying than I did before.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?         Yes

Have you shared this experience with others?         No

What emotions did you experience following your experience?  I was very afraid at first, of not surviving, having a second, fatal heart attack. I was.....intensely curious about why I am here and why was I allowed to live.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      the best part has been me re-evaluating what's important in my life, what I want to do, what really makes me happy.

the worst part has been the pain, the physical restrictions, and still not knowing why I am still here.

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?        well, I really just want to know why me?....why did I have a heart attack at 34, with no warning and why am I still here....its the ever elusive purpose of life question and I am incredibly curious about it. I feel as if I am still here for a reason I just havent found the reason yet.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes