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Veronica M's Mother's Experience

Experience description:   

I had to write to tell you about this.  My mother who had a very long struggle with Alzheimer's passed on Jan. 30, 2010.  She had been non communicative for quite a while.  When we put her on hospice care about 2 weeks prior to her death, her struggle was intense.  Even though she was non verbal, you could feel the anguish and fear emanating from her.  The hospice allowed us to pull up a bed next to hers and we took turns trying to hold her and whisper into her ear that she would be fine, to go to the light, that Jesus and her mom and family would be waiting.  She held on to life with all of her might.  On what was her last night, we knew the end was near because her body was mottled and turning black from the toes and reached at the time of her death up to her thorax.  She was guppy breathing, eyes closed and we laid on either side of her telling her it was ok to go.  I got frustrated (we had been up for over 24hours and her suffering was so palpable) and I said out loud "God, why can't you just give her a break and help her over".  In the meantime, we had stopped talking to her, I had told my family that she was just doing brain stem breathing and couldn't hear us anymore. 

So, we were surprised when she opened her mouth in shock, when I said that out loud.  God forgive me, but I thought, Oh no!  She is rallying and her suffering is going to continue.  My husband and son had left the room about 20 minutes earlier to try to nap for a bit, but I sent for them, so they could see how she wasn't going to give up life so soon.  When they got in the room, they were shocked to see us watching my mom open her mouth and make a surprised expression.  She then started smiling and grinned from ear to ear.  We were stunned, but once again thought she had rallied and her struggle would continue.  Then she tried to open her eyes, but couldn't, then mouthed the words "good bye" and then took her last breath.  She was totally at peace.  We all sat there stunned and even waited to get our bearings before we could go get someone to declare time of death.  Her face was literally glowing.  I just wanted to pass this along.  If I had been by myself, I would have thought that I imagined it, but there were 5 of us who witnessed it.  And amazingly agreed on exactly what we had all seen.

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Uncertain     

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          Uncertain     

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?    just before final breath

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?    More consciousness and alertness than normal

            just before final breath

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?  Uncertain      I don't know what she saw

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?
            Uncertain      she responded to my cry for help

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Uncertain

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            joy and peace

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?          Uncertain      I don't know what she saw

Did you see a light?           Uncertain      I don't know

Did you meet or see any other beings?           Uncertain      I don't know

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?    Uncertain     

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          Uncertain     

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?            Yes     she seemed to recognize and be very happy about who she saw

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Uncertain      I don't know

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?     Uncertain            I don't know

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Uncertain      I don't know

Did you become aware of future events?       Uncertain
            I don't know

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?     No      

Have you shared this experience with others?         No      

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?    Yes            Yes, but I didn't think I would see her so vividly experience it

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:            Experience was definitely real    we have all talked about how we all experienced seeing her exact passing

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?   

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:            Experience was definitely real   

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?           Uncertain     

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?           

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No               

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?         No