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Ulla B's Experience

Circumstances around the time of the experience: Other: No obvious reason. I was well and lying in my bed on a very ordinary evening.  

EXPERIENCE DESCRIPTION:

Ulla: In 1984 I had an out-of-body experience, which has given me knowledge of the divine, and which has affected me ever since. I have concluded that the most important thing in life is love, and that this is the only thing we can take with us.  

What follows is the story of my experience, which has previously been published on the website of Kristeligt Dagblad (Christian newspaper):

With the following story, which has influenced my life, I would like to contribute toward a debate in the National Church, about the significance of religious experiences, and how these compare with the Church’s beliefs and practices.

It was in November ‘84, on an ordinary afternoon, just after I had gone to bed – I was not ill, and I did not in any way attempt to produce this event. I was not newly religious, or meditating or anything of the sort. Suddenly, I was pulled out of my body through my head, with great force. It felt very strange to suddenly find myself floating up above. For a moment I thought that I would like to see my body, but it was dark, and the force that pulled me out was stronger than my own will. I was curious, but not afraid. Time ceased to exist.

I was sucked into a “tunnel”. It was unearthly, and did not resemble anything I had ever seen. It had vaulted arches in deep colors, and was infinitely large. I had a spirit body, and was able to feel myself (and later see myself – it is very difficult to explain) as a pale light, with vibrating threads or points). I heard unearthly music or tones that were utterly different than anything I had ever heard before. At the same time I speeded up, accelerated to a speed that I knew was as fast as the speed of light. It was wonderful and timeless! The experience of being in another dimension filled me.  

At the end of the tunnel there was light, and I went into it. The light did not hurt my “eyes”, though it was exceptionally strong. It vibrated and was living love. I knew at once that this was God. A “voice” penetrated me and asked questions about my life and about things I had done. Why I did what I did, why it was so important, why I thought/worried so much about the future, material things, why I was feared this and that.  

I saw brief images of my life. This part of the experience is unclear – I don’t recall the details, only the feeling I had, that nothing really mattered, and that I shouldn’t spend time on it. The most important thing in life, the only important thing was love for other people, the love that encompasses us. Giving and receiving love from others, as well as offering and wanting to offer forgiveness. Living in the moment – joy in what we see and experience. The Light – God’s love felt warm and vibrated throughout my “body”.  

At the same time something strange happened: the feeling of being a person on earth with a name and familiar surroundings slowly disappeared. It was like something I had seen in a reverse telescope, distant and unclear. It was so different from where I now found myself, that I could not image myself clothed in a “heavy, corporal substance”.  Basically, my life on earth seemed very far away. This meant that I could not remember what I was called or who I was. I could not remember the names of those closest to me. Not remembering did not make me feel bad, and I did not resist. All that mattered was the Light/God, and I wanted to remain there.  

Suddenly in that process of forgetting, I remembered my youngest child who was 2 years old, and who would miss me if I stayed in the Light. At the very moment I remembered her, I was out of it.  I found myself in a kind of nothingness – a pale grey substance, where I floated around, curled up like a fetus. I have never felt as alone as I did there. I felt so sad that I was no longer in the Light. And then suddenly I was back in my body. How long this took I have no idea. But for me, it was the most significant event I have ever experienced.

For the first few days I felt euphoric. I “soared” with happiness and love for all. Then something happened which I would not have been able to explain had I not had this experience.

Every single day since, I have at some point felt a deep gratitude for this experience. It is still just as clear in my mind years later. But it has also been difficult, because it isn’t something you tell other people, except perhaps those who are closest. I have worked hard to explain to them that it wasn’t a dream.   

I feel that this experience has changed my life completely, mostly because I now have no fear of death (apart from possible pain or disability before dying).  

In later years I have been more open about my experience: A few years ago I participated in the program Apropos Lys (About the Light) on DR (Danish Radio) channel 1 and told about my experience. The story has also been posted on Kristelig Dagblads debate page on the internet. In a few days, in February 2015, I will talk about it on the program Mennesker og tro (People and Faith), on Danish Radio channel 1. I have also registered my experiences on other websites in English. I don’t know if this website is the same one I have written to earlier. If so, I apologize.  

I have always wanted to return to the Light, and since my experience I have also searched for similar stories...

At the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event?   No 

Was the experience difficult to express in words?  Yes.   Yes, it is difficult to explain because it is not possible to compare it to anything earthly. For instance, being sucked into an infinite tunnel with enormous force and moving at the speed of light – this has no meaning on an earthly plane. I was often noticed that people tend to forget what I have told them – even those close to me, like my mother. They have heard me tell the story several times, and each time thought it was the first time I’d told it.  

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?            An odd question: I was very aware throughout. The feeling of being pulled out through the back of my head was something I will never forget. That wonderful trip through the tunnel where the speed was so intense, and the meeting with the Light, which gave me a complete and blissful feeling of oneness, love, well-being, which I have never felt here on earth. (It is odd to talk about senses when you have no body, but there was an experience of the senses that cannot be compared to anything I have ever sensed in my own body). All that remains unclear are the images that were shown of my life.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness?      More consciousness and alertness than normal.   I was in another dimension, where Light or God communicated with me without words – I just knew and understood immediately. My identity had been removed, dissolved, and all that I knew about myself as a human being was distant – like a shadow existence without relevance. I experienced my spiritual body as a series of points of light gathered by energy. The Light was something unearthly – a giant consciousness which was all-knowing and without end.  

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.   My vision during the experience: there were colors I had never seen – like in the tunnel, where it was dark, but also bluish or purple. The light did not hurt my eyes, but was also somewhat solid and more than just light, it was God.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.   Hearing: I understood, but there were no spoken words. I also heard unearthly music or tones in the tunnel.  

Did you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that your consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body?   No  

What emotions did you feel during the experience?   In the beginning I felt curious and wonder. When I entered the Light I felt indescribable joy, endless love. When reviewing my life: a feeling of becoming wiser – because I had been stupid…Outside of the light I felt sorrow and loneliness while in the grey nothingness.  

Did you pass into or through a tunnel?   Yes.  I was sucked into a “tunnel”. It was unearthly, and did not resemble anything I had ever seen. It had vaulted arches in deep colors, and was infinitely large. I had a spirit body, and was able to feel myself (and later see myself – it is very difficult to explain) as a pale light, with vibrating threads or points). I heard unearthly music or tones that were utterly different than anything I had ever heard before. At the same time I speeded up, accelerated to a speed that I knew was as fast as the speed of light. It was wonderful and timeless! The experience of being in another dimension filled me.   At the end of the tunnel there was light, and I went into it.  

Did you see an unearthly light?   Yes   At the end of the tunnel there was light, and I went into it. The light did not hurt my “eyes”, though it was exceptionally strong. It vibrated and was living love. I knew at once that this was God. A “voice” penetrated me and asked questions about my life and about things I had done. Why I did what I did, why it was so important, why I thought/worried so much about the future, material things, why I was afraid of this and that. 

I saw brief images of my life. This part of the experience is unclear – I don’t recall the details, only the feeling I had, that nothing really mattered, and that I shouldn’t spend time on it. The most important thing in life, the only important thing was love for other people, the love that encompasses us. Giving and receiving love from others, as well as offering and wanting to offer forgiveness. Living in the moment – joy in what we see and experience. The Light – God’s love felt warm and vibrated throughout my “body”. 

At the same time something strange happened: the feeling of being a person on earth with a name and familiar surroundings slowly disappeared. It was like something I had seen in a reverse telescope, distant and unclear. It was so different from where I now found myself, that I could not image myself clothed in a “heavy, corporal substance”.  Basically, my life on earth seemed very far away. This meant that I could not remember what I was called and who I was. I couldn’t remember the names of those closest to me. Not remembering did not make me feel bad, and I did not resist. All that mattered was the Light/God, and I wanted to remain there. 


Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice?   I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin.
This is difficult to answer. The Light was a giant consciousness, it was God. I did not hear anything, but could still understand. I did not reply, but was still understood.  
 

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)?   No  

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings?   No  

Did you become aware of past events in your life during your experience?   Yes   I saw images of my life. This part of the experience is unclear – I don’t remember the details, just the feeling I had that it was all so unimportant, and that I shouldn’t focus on it. The most important thing in the world is the love for other people who surround us. Being able to and wanting to give and receive love from others and being able to and wanting to forgive. Living in the moment and feeling joy for all we see and experience. The Light – God’s love, felt warm and vibrated throughout my whole “body”.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world?   A clearly mystical or unearthly realm. Yes, completely unearthly. Heavenly, Divine, and indescribable. At the end of the tunnel there was light, and I went in. The light did not hurt my “eyes”, though it was very bright. It vibrated and was living love. I knew at once that this was God.

Did time seem to speed up or slow down?   Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
Time stood still and was at the same time infinite. My earthly life was so very far away that I slowly forgot about it until I left the Light. The next question is impossible for me to answer – because I was not unified with the world, but with the Light or God. The world seemed to no longer exist when I had the experience, so no, this does not apply to how I felt.  

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything?   No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?   No

Did you come to a border or point of no return?   No

Did scenes from the future come to you?  No 

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness suggesting that there either is (or is not) continued existence after earthly life (“life after death”)?   Yes   I was given clear knowledge of the fact that consciousness continues forever. I knew that the only thing we can take with us from our earthly existence is love. Anything else is unimportant.  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that God or a supreme being either does (or does not) exist?   Yes   I was not in doubt. The infinite Light was an infinite, all-knowing consciousness. It was God.  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that you either did (or did not) exist prior to this lifetime?   Yes   It is difficult to answer: I had an experience, without words, that I had removed my mortal coil and that this was not unique.  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that a mystical universal connection or unity/oneness either does (or does not) exist?   Yes   Yes, I was aware that everything is connected and that God encompasses everything, butt hat we also have free will to act.  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life’s meaning or purpose?   Yes  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life’s difficulties, challenges, or hardships?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding love?   Yes   The Light – God is love, and that is the purpose of life.  

During your experience, did you encounter any other specific information / awareness that you have not shared in other questions that is relevant to living our earthly lives?   No  

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge or purpose?   No  

What occurred during your experience included:   Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience   Previously, even though I had retained a form of belief in God, after I had written off the religion I was raised in, I had also doubted. I suffered from fear of the future, fear that something would happen to me or those I loved. My experience changed me from being a doubter to not only having a firm faith in God – but to be certain of the existence of God. It is a major change from not only believing, but also knowing. It is not something you can just tell other people. I began to seek for a place to belong. I read whatever I could find about near death experiences in English and searched the internet. I chose to become a member of the national church, even though I did not hold all of the same beliefs I view different religions as a kind of language, affixed with many different layers of conventions, ideologies, rituals, habits, mythological beings, myths – but all build upon the same foundation – an omnipotent God, who we are all a part of.

So I choose the basic national religion as it is. It suits me best, because I understand the language. The best sermons and pastors I have heard are those that promote the importance of love. I sense this in the Lord’s Prayer, and in the feeling of community during evening communion. I ignore all the other negative things. If I were a pastor, I know I wouldn’t be able to deal with that. I don’t believe in the fall of man, original sin or the literal interpretation of the resurrection of Jesus.

I believe that the worship of the crucifixion in Christianity is in many ways horrible – imagine, an instrument of torture and death hanging in all the Christian churches! I would rather envision Jesus the way Thorvaldsen depicts him, with his arms out, victoriously embracing the world. I still acknowledge a few things in the story of Jesus’ suffering, because he accepts death without resistance, and he shows love toward his executioners. Thus he steps over the threshold of death. But I don’t understand why he is the reason our sins can be forgiven. Does that mean that people who are not Christian, or who lived before Christianity are doomed? To me, that seems like utter nonsense.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience?   I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience. It was the most important event of my life, so of course I remember it more clearly than anything else.  

Discuss any changes that might have occurred in your life after your experience:   Prayer has become part of my daily routine, and I also pray when I feel uncertain. I often visit churches to enjoy the silence, have a feeling of inner peace and divine presence. It does not matter whether it is our national church or another church. I sometimes attend a service, just to feel something religious, even though I do not believe in all the dogmas. Previously I avoided the church and hardly ever prayed.

My experience directly resulted in:  
Moderate changes in my life

Did you have any changes in your values or beliefs after the experience that occurred as a result of the experience?  
Yes   Material things are less important. I place greater emphasis on human relationships.  

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience?   No  

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you?    
The Light and the experience of God.  

Have you ever shared this experience with others?   Yes  First I shared this experience with my husband who lay beside me in the same bed. He said it was a dream, which made me upset. Later he has come to believe that it was really my experience.  

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?   No  

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:   Experience was definitely real   It was and has remained real.  

What do you believe about the reality of your experience at the current time:   Experience was definitely real. It is rarely far from my thoughts. I think about it almost every evening or during the day. I return to it every time I feel unsure. It is very real to me now as I sit and write about it.  

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?   No  

Have your religious beliefs/spiritual practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?   Yes.  Yes, I pray regularly, and in all difficult situations. I visit religious places to feel inner peace. I meditate on the Light and sometimes have a sense of a divine presence.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience?   No      

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?   Yes  

What could a national organization with an interest in near death experience (NDE) do that would be of interest to you?    Continue to spread knowledge of it. Research the phenomenon. Help to connect people who have had these experiences.  

Are there any other questions that we could ask to help you communicate your experience?   No, I feel this is a good and thorough questionnaire.