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Sara W's Experience

Experience description:   

I believe what I experienced was in direct relation to my breast cancer diagnosis. About a year before I was diagnosed I had a dream or vision that I was sitting having a conversation with my mother in law and sister in law when I suddenly felt a stab of pain in my right side. I looked down and saw blood. It hurt so bad but I didn't want to draw attention to it and disrupt our conversation. My family didn't notice the blood. Then all of a sudden the room to the right split, but only I noticed. I saw people walking by on the right side like it was a different dimension. They were excitedly going places and meeting people. Everyone was so happy and excited. I saw people greeting others with smiles and hugs. And a sense of excitement to teach the loved ones they greeted. I noticed the clothes they were wearing weren't just white, but blue, pink, even black. The shirts and pants were the same color, like scrubs. I noticed the place every one was gathered in was like a train station but I saw no trains. It was also a place of great learning I felt. I saw great pillars go up to a ceiling I couldn't see because it was too high. The walls were made of glass and light came in through them. It felt like a train station/University. Then an elderly couple walked past me arm in arm. They were smiling and talking and the man glanced over at me. When he saw me looking at him he did a double take and nudged his wife and said something like "she is aware of us". He stopped and came to talk to me. I noticed other people stopping and looking at me too. He acknowledged my wound I was holding and asked if it hurt. I said yes but it was fine. He asked if I was ready. I said no. Then that was it. I woke up.

Now I thought at the time what a lovely, weird dream of heaven. I sometimes have weird dreams but this stuck with me, I remember it vividly. I didn't think much of it until about a year later I was diagnosed with breast cancer. In my right breast.

Just before I found my lump I had been struggling with my faith, is my church true? Is there a God? Because I had two young boys I wanted to know what I should teach them, if I should go back to church. My husband had confided in me before my vision that he no longer thought our church to be true and that the founding prophet of it to be false. I was devastated. I still believed. Because I love him we eventually talked about why he felt that way and so I then began to struggle with my faith. I remember laying in bed praying, tears streaming down my face asking Heavenly Father what was right, what was true. I told him I didn't care what the answer was I just needed to know. I said the words "I am ready to know." Maybe a week later I was diagnosed.

Trying to make a long story short, (too late) I recalled my dream of heaven. At the time I thought the man asked if I was ready to die. But then I realized he was asking if I was ready to know the truth, if I was ready for God to use my body as a vessel for a miracle to prove to me he exists. 

My cancer was caught very early and I feel it has to do with my prayer telling God I was ready. I believe I had the cancer at the time of my vision. My experience showed me there was a God, and some things I found out about about my church during my fight with cancer led me to believe my church I had grown up in was not true. I ended up beating cancer and gaining a closer understanding and love for life and my creator. When things were uncertain during my fight, my vision brought me great comfort in a life after death. I think that is why I was blessed with it.

At the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event?   Uncertain   Shortly after my experience I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer.

Was the experience difficult to express in words?....No....

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?....Normal consciousness and alertness    This all appeared to me in a dream, but I was more aware during this "dream" than any other I've had. I also recall it like I had it yesterday. It left me with a feeling that stayed with me for a long time if wonder and amazement. That is why I believe it was more than just a dream.....

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.    The same.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.    My hearing was the same as my everyday hearing.

Did you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that your consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body?    Uncertain   This was a vision, I was never apart from my body.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?....Wonder, surprise and awe. Pain in my right side, embarrassment because I was bleeding.  

Did you pass into or through a tunnel?....No....

Did you see an unearthly light?....No....

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice?....I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin    The elderly man with his wife spoke to me as he was passing by.

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings?....Yes    The elderly man was a spirit, I did not know him although he did introduce himself and his wife to me (don't remember his name).

Did you become aware of past events in your life during your experience?....No....

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world?....Some unfamiliar and strange place....It had earthly characteristics, it was like a giant train station/university. But in another dimension.

Did time seem to speed up or slow down?....No....

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything?....No....

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?....Yes....We were contained in a building.

Did you come to a border or point of no return?....No....

Did scenes from the future come to you?....No....

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge or purpose?....Uncertain....I felt I was special because I was aware of everyone, that dimension, even though they were aware of me, it seemed odd to them and special that I could see them.

Discuss any changes that might have occurred in your life after your experience:....Large changes in my life........

Did you have any changes in your values or beliefs after the experience that occurred as a result of the experience?    Yes     It is hard to explain but I no longer believe it is hard to be accepted into heaven, I still believe you need to be a good person and live your life as Jesus would want you to but I don't believe in the steps my former church said were required to get into heaven.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience?....No    

Have you ever shared this experience with others?   Yes   I told my mother in law the next day.  I think she thought it was an important and special message given to me . I have shared it  with my mother when I realized the true message of it. And just recently shared it with my husband,.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?....Yes     This is a spiritual manifestation, or vision. Not a NDE although I was shown the afterlife.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:....Experience was definitely real   

What do you believe about the reality of your experience at the current time:....Experience was definitely real....I know it was a gift to get me through a really tough and scary time when I was struggling with my faith and was not certain if I would live.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?....No....

Have your religious beliefs/spiritual practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?....Yes    I have different feelings about my church.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience?....No   

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?    Yes   

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you?     The wound in my right side was significant to me because it represented the cancer in my right breast. Being asked if I was ready was significant in that it meant "are you ready for the truth and for God to show you miracles?".