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Rebecca V's Experiences


Experience description:  

What I'm about to share, are three experiences I've had that I can only describe as being near death-like. I have wondered and struggled with the thoughts of 'Why did I have these experiences? What am I supposed to do with this knowledge? Why me? What do you want me to do?' So I have finally decided to get the word out and share this with others. (Let it be noted that I am a completely sane and rational person. :P And if truth be told, I am sure many people have gone through similar things as I have, but feel lost as to what to do or who to share it with, at the risk of sounding crazy or ridiculed. Luckily I have very little shame, but a lot of emotion, so needed to get this message out. And I have carefully thought about others dismissing my stories outright because it is not a 'true' NDE, but rather near death-like, and I am okay with that. I just wanted to share these instances in the hopes that it might reach someone who needs it.)

1. So the first event, happened in 1995. I was riding in the back of my parent's car looking out the window, just contemplating, when I wondered to myself with an innocent curiosity, 'Hm... I wonder why that sign is red and white... Why did the owners choose those colors?' Then suddenly it HIT me! Everything! The answers to everything. I KNEW everything. I knew why the signs were that color, I knew why fish swam, I knew why we do the things we do, I knew why we were here, I knew everything there was to know. It was so instantaneous; like a split second. And obviously I couldn't contain all the knowledge. It happened so fast, and so much information all at once, that it was just a huge flash of insight.

Unfortunately, because of the vast information afforded to me, I couldn't retain any of it. It was almost like a swift gust of wind that just blows past you. You know it happened, but you have no evidence of it. I've asked family and friends if they've ever had anything similar happen to them, but was always answered with a 'no'. ...Which is what later in life prompted me to research up on this subject and see if anyone else has experienced something like it. And that is what led me to NDEs. A lot of their stories seem to include a huge download of information, as if everything is already known... 'we' just 'forget' because we WANT TO for the sake of learning and growing spiritually, or simply because with our human mind, we can't comprehend all of it.

2. Now this event I was significantly more hesitant in telling people... I have only told two people as I'm typing this up...

This incident happened in 2010. So it's been about 5-6 years since this happened. And again, I didn't get into NDEs until later. Not until around 2014-now.

Well, I was lying in bed and I had just woken up. As in, my mind woke up. I was still laying peacefully in bed, my eyelids haven't even had a chance to open. Well, out of nowhere (in my head?) I heard this voice speaking to me.

Now, I know what dreams are. (Well, not REALLY, but I AM familiar with them. Written down 2,000+.. not to mention the many, MANY dreams I haven't written down.) I am also familiar with hypnagogic/hypnopompic hallucinations and have experienced several different dream states (lucid dreams/OBEs/false awakenings/consciously entered a dream, etc.).

THIS didn't seem like a dream to me. Again, I was very conscious. But before I could even open my eyes, I heard the voice. Clearly a male voice. It couldn't have been my own thoughts in my head. I could also feel vibrations along with his voice. (I'm also familiar with the vibrations when trying to induce OBEs/lucid dreams. Had a few, but not nearly as many as I'd like.) And this event was very clear, concise, and not hallucinatory at all. Anyway, this voice was asking me a very specific question(s). He was asking me if I could forgive *insert name here*. Some of these people I knew, and some I didn't (at least, I don't believe I did..). Each name that the voice gave me, I automatically knew insights into them. As to what they have done - the sins they committed, what kind of person they were. I responded each time with my answer. Some I would forgive, some I wouldn't. I had to contemplate on a couple. Well, here's the interesting part. Each time I replied with a forgiving answer, I would feel the vibrations getting *stronger*. When I wouldn't forgive the person, the vibrations would fade away. Each time this happened. I would forgive a person, the vibrations would come back, and grow stronger with each forgiving answer. If I felt like 'no, I wouldn't forgive them' these vibrations would fade, get weaker. He must have asked me at least 5 or 6 different people, and my answers were about 2/3 in favor of forgiveness. Maybe even half.

Finally after the last person, the voice diminished/faded as well as the vibrations. My last answer must have been a negative. I realized after this experience that I was supposed to answer with all forgiveness. NO MATTER WHAT. It seems so inconceivable to me to forgive a murderer, rapist, etc. It's against human morals, right? But this *test*, I call it, clearly wanted my answers to be all forgiving.

For some reason, I was being tested. This voice, whoever it was, seemed to be monitoring my answers and showing me, through vibrations, what path I was supposed to take. I've had to research further into what these vibrations mean. I mean, I don't need scientific evidence to back all these claims up. I figure a multitude of people's testimony is sufficient enough for me, especially when I've experienced first-hand similar things. So up until my research into vibrations, I figured it was only a prelude to lucid dreams/OBEs. It's what our spirit bodies experience when exitting our physical one. Seemed plausible enough to me. But when reading more into it, come to realize that the higher vibration you are, the more spiritually sound you are. (Metaphysically speaking.) We should be striving for the highest vibration there is. Which essentially means bettering ourselves in our lifetime(s). Not with physical/materialistic needs. But how we treat each other, how forgiving we are.

3. So this most recent incident happened in 2014/2015. I was at a really low point in my life, just dejected and feeling torn, shattered. I was up and getting ready to start the day, and at one point just paused and stood in the living room, sadly contemplating the meaning of life, etc. Thinking to myself, 'there has to be a meaning to all this'. Then, out of nowhere, in the back of my mind, heard the word 'love'.

I admit, I kind of scoffed at the idea. I was like, 'Ok. Fine. I'll bite. But ONLY if you give me a sign. Not just one. You show me the word 'love' three times today, and I'll believe you. But it has to be TODAY. All three, TODAY.' and kind of wished them good luck. (And I have no idea who I was requesting this to; a guardian, an angel, God, just whoever out there that may have implanted the word 'love' in my head. Or whether it was myself unknowingly answering the question. Regardless, I wanted my signs.)

So I went on my merry way, not really thinking anything about my prayer for signs. I did not want to go out of my way to *search* for the signs. That would've skewered my perception of it should it happen. It had to be something that would hit me without my influence.

Well, to make a very long story short, sure enough, it did.

The first sign I received was in the form of a bumper sticker:

*Love is the answer.* Straight away I saw it. I was impressed, but was still adamant that I see the sign two more times that day.

The second showed itself in a billboard: *Love heals.* and showed adult(s)/child(ren) smiling.

The third happened just 14 minutes before midnight, as if deliberately making me wait after I had all but given up hope of seeing it a third time. It was from an internet article ad saying 'Meditate on Love.' I was a bit shaken up, because I was almost certain at that point that I wasn't going to get the third sign. It had pretty much slipped my mind and my mentality was, 'I knew I wasn't going to see it.' and left it at that. So the sign hitting me that late, was like a slap in the face. A huge wake-up call.

It was also *fascinating* to me that ALL three signs not only contained the word 'love', but also used it in simple, yet significant messages. It wasn't something like 'I love my convertible mustang.' Every single sign given to me had a meaning behind it, which just drove the point home further.

And you would think that'd be the end of that incident.

But no! I had another one, that deals with the same message. When most of us go through life, we tend to want to rationalize or think things through with a 'logical' perspective. So later, a year later perhaps, I was questioning the signs I received. What if it was all a fluke? What if it was one of those crazy coincidences? What if I'm completely off my rocker and there's nothing significant out there? Would the universe *really* give me another sign if I asked for it again? Should I ask for it again? Wouldn't that be selfish and annoying to ask for another sign even though I already received it? -All these things were going through my head that day.

Well, as I was taking my sister and son out to lunch that day, had ordered my food and something compelled me to read a single, solitary sign that was hanging up in the back of the restaurant. I had to physically get up out of my seat to read it. It was just curious to me that the one sign they had was back there and I felt pushed to read it.

I go up to read it, not expecting anything, and here's what I was greeted with:







It managed to give me all 3 of my signs; the word 'love', 3 times, in one sign.

I struggled to hold back tears as I was with my sister and son and didn't want to confuse them as to why I was crying. It's been something I kept to myself because... who would believe something like this? That I 'heard' a voice telling me that 'love' is why we're here...? And that I questioned the universe (or whoever/whatever) and they're responding? So I have to get this out because why else would I be getting these 'messages'? I feel as if I need to share this with others, even if people might not believe me, as long as I get the word out, maybe they'll keep it in the back of their head and let the thought grow that it is a possibility that there's something more to this world than we originally thought.

And thank you so much for reading. I'm sorry it wasn't a legitimate NDE (and sorry it was so long...) but I've noticed in an abundant number of NDEs that 'love and forgiveness' are a running theme, and my experiences are what led me to looking up NDEs in the first place, and that they were eerily similar. Felt like it was important that I share these.

Thanks again!

At the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event? No

Was the experience difficult to express in words? More vivid than usual Still in regard to the second incident, my eyes were closed the whole time. Only saw blackness upon waking up but not opening my eyes.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? Yes

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? It's hard to explain how I didn't have to verbally or even mentally respond to this voice. 'He' knew what I was feeling, how I felt about the person he named, simply through my feelings and emotions. I didn't have to telepathically say, 'Yes' or 'No'. He KNEW how I felt. And I KNEW those people once he said their names. Knew everything about them. Faster than usual

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.

Did you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that your consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body?
Relief or calmness Happiness

What emotions did you feel during the experience? No

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? No

Did you see an unearthly light? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin Heard a voice most notably in the second experience, clearly a male voice. If I had to describe this voice, it had a quiet powerfulness to it, if that makes sense. It wasn't angry, happy, sad... it had almost a non-judgmental authority to it. As if the voice was there for a purpose, but with no strings attached as to the outcome. Simply wanting to feel my response. Although the vibrations were signaling which path I should take.

In the third experience, heard the word 'love', but could not tell if it was my inner voice, or a response from a different source.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? Uncertain
I could not tell with certainty who the disembodied voice(s) belong to.

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)? I could not tell with certainty who the disembodied voice(s) belong to. Yes

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? In the first experience, where I had the sudden flash of insight/instant knowledge, I knew EVERYTHING. Past, present, future... everything just was and made sense, as if an 'of course!' feeling. But it was gone so fast that I couldn't remember specifics. My past flashed before me, out of my control

Did you become aware of past events in your life during your experience? No

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? (From the first experience only) The knowledge hit me all at once, like being struck by lightning (I'd imagine...) Just a sudden surge and then it was over, but in that one tiny moment, contained all the information there was to know, as simple or convoluted as it was.
I felt united or one with the world

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything about the universe
For the first experience, I understood/knew everything there was to know. That one innocent inquiry of mine as to why the owners chose those two colors, opened my mind and heart in that one split second to understand everything. It was incredible. I have no idea why I was given that flash of insight.

In the second experience, when the voice asked me if I would forgive a certain person, upon hearing their name, I would instantly know everything about them. I knew their life, their actions, their thoughts.. I knew them so well it was almost as if I might as well have been them.

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? No

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No

Did you come to a border or point of no return? Uncertain

Did scenes from the future come to you? I feel sorry this answer, and the next few that follow, are anti-climactic:

In my first experience, I knew/understood everything. But I could not retain any of the information. So I had, at that precise moment, knew the answer to this question. But it was taken from me as quickly as it was given to me.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness suggesting that there either is (or is not) continued existence after earthly life ("life after death")? Same as above Uncertain

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that God or a supreme being either does (or does not) exist? Same as above Uncertain

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that you either did (or did not) exist prior to this lifetime? Same as above Yes

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that a mystical universal connection or unity/oneness either does (or does not) exist? In my third experience, I was desperately pleading for an answer to 'Why are we here? What is the meaning of all of this?' And I heard a voice, within me, but not me, clearly say, 'Love.' That's all the voice said. And I tested this voice, asking it to give me a sign. I wanted to see the word three times that day. And sure enough, I did. About a year later, I was questioning/even doubting myself that maybe it was all just a fluke... so I contemplated asking for another sign. I did not even get a chance to officially ask for it, when I received it. Uncertain

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life’s meaning or purpose? In my first experience, I knew/understood everything. But I could not retain any of the information. So I had, at that precise moment, knew the answer to this question. But it was taken from me as quickly as it was given to me. No

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life’s difficulties, challenges, or hardships?
In my third experience, the voice said simply, 'Love', when I pleaded for a reason/purpose as to why we're here. And received three signs when I asked for it:

Love is the answer.

Love heals.

Meditate on Love.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding love? Yes

During your experience, did you encounter any other specific information / awareness that you have not shared in other questions that is relevant to living our earthly lives? The first experience I had, I had a knowledge of everything. It was so clear, so precise, as if it was common sense, and why didn't everyone know it? I think I had a glimpse into the source of everything, but being here on Earth in a physical body, I was not allowed (or unable) to retain it. Content that was entirely not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge or purpose? I have never been religious (still am not), but was not spiritual either. I believed there was SOMEthing in our world that we can't explain, so maybe I was agnostic with an open mind. And I (still, sometimes, to be honest) at the time believed that what goes around, comes around and people will get what they deserve. But I did not take into consideration Forgiveness, and if people truly repent what they have done... then what? Should they be forgiven? Or are some acts too reprehensible to be forgiven? According to 'the voice', Forgiveness is a huge key.

And I had no idea what our purpose is in the world. At times I thought it was meaningless. We sleep, eat, work, hobbies, socialize.. then we die.. Terrible things happen in the world (most of them from humanity), why? What's the point?

Now I honestly, truly believe that Love is why we're here. We are here to learn to love one another and take care of each other. It's the most important thing we can do in life. And that includes everything in nature; the Earth, plants, animals... I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of th

What occurred during your experience included: I remember these events and the impact they've made on my life, to the point where I have made it a mission of mine to figure out what was going on with me. Which is what led me to research these experiences and realized that others had similar things happen with them. Mostly through NDEs, but also through spiritually transformative experiences. It has affected me so much, that I am a completely different person than I was 10 years ago. I practically shudder to think what kind of path I'd be on if I had not had these experiences. God probably exists

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? God definitely exists I was uncertain if an afterlife exists

Discuss any changes that might have occurred in your life after your experience: Before, I was unsure what I believed in, if I even believed in anything. Now I feel in my heart that there is a reason/purpose for our being here (Love, namely), and I am trying to follow a spiritual path and spread this message.

My experience directly resulted in:

Did you have any changes in your values or beliefs after the experience that occurred as a result of the experience?
All three experiences have deeply impacted my life. I don't know why I had these experiences. I was not anywhere near-death, and yet SOMEONE out there felt a reason to reach out to me. I have struggled with 'why me?'. I'm not special enough. I'm not a doctor, a well-known atheist, a famous scientist.. I'm no one. Just an average person that has no significant opinion or well-researched documentation to have any credibility. I keep inwardly arguing with this voice(s) that they've chosen the wrong person. But all I can do is relay this message, and hope it reaches someone.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? Yes My first experience I shared right away, because I was curious if anyone had something similar happen to them. And I was quite young so had that naivety. I asked my family and friends, but they had no idea what I was talking about. They just kind of shrugged it off like, 'Ooookaay....' so I just left it alone. Although I KNOW it happened.

My second and third experience took me longer to share with anyone, because that's when I heard 'voices', and was older and more knowledgeable to what is considered 'normal' and not ... so most rational people would be hesitant to reveal to others that they heard a disembodied voice speaking to them. XP But I eventually did share this information, up until now just to my sister and dear friend of mine. My sister believes me, but it does not faze her, although I think it is giving her food for thought, and my friend I think does believe it's happened to me, but I don't believe it fazes him either... all I can do is share this.. I know it's hard for people to grasp. If I was on the other side of the coin, I'd be curious, but unless it's happened to me I'd just be like, 'Hm.. that's interesting.'

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you?

Have you ever shared this experience with others?
Experience was definitely real

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? I had no doubt about the first two experiences. I KNEW that those experiences happened and were not just a trick of my mind. The third experience, however, I was unsure of. I knew I heard the voice say 'Love', but did that come from me? An outside source? What was it? The signs? What if they were just a coincidence? What if I saw synchronicities where there weren't any? So I contemplated asking for a repeat of the sign about a year later, just to confirm what I saw and make sure I wasn't just wishful thinking. But I did not officially ask for it, and still got the sign I was hoping for, all at once. Experience was definitely real

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened: Same as above Yes

What do you believe about the reality of your experience at the current time: I am much closer to my sister (my Mom has since passed on), and although I value friendship and relationships, I feel at times that if we become too focused on societal norms, it distracts us from our sole/soul purpose of loving one another unconditionally. Don't get me wrong, I believe it is important to connect and have bonds with others, but if we hold too close to that, it could cause discord and upset when things don't go our way. So I try and have a more freeing outlook on relationships. Yes

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience? Before, I felt as if God probably did exist, although I was not religious. I still am not religious, but tell people I'm more spiritual. I believe there is a Higher Power at work, but do not read the Bible or attend church. I do pray though and believe in Jesus as well. No

Have your religious beliefs/spiritual practices changed specifically as a result of your experience? I think I have said plenty.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes A couple of the questions had me ponder an aspect I would otherwise not have given a second thought to.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience? I have always thought we could gain further insight into the mysteries of life through dreams/OBEs... and since people speculate that NDEs could be a byproduct of dreams, it would make sense to study them further. Perhaps something delving into those subjects can help shed some light on NDEs as well.

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? I cannot think of any at this time.