Matthew T's Experience
I had gone to sleep on a Friday night. I hadn't gone to bed late because I had to be at work at 6:30 in the morning. During the night I had awoke. My room was very dark (I wake up during the night often when I'm shifting my sleep schedule around, and my eyes are always pretty sensitive to ambient light from the window). I was curious about what time it was, so I could know how much longer I could sleep before I had to get ready for work. I tried to get up to look at my alarm clock (I always face it away from me because the light bothers me at night), but when I moved I felt a powerful vibration across my entire body. It was like when you rest your head on a running piece of machinery for a moment and feel your head vibrating, but this was head to toe. I was confused by this and stopped moving. I laid there and thought about it for a few seconds, but was curious so I tried it again. This time I let the vibration happen for awhile then it suddenly stopped and I felt like I had been ripped from my body. I didn't want to open my eyes, so I held them shut because I was afraid of what I might see. Regardless of this attempt I could still see just fine. I knew I was completely conscious, just like I am now.
The next part feels a little hazy, like it happened a long time ago. I remember a sense of someone discussing with me that I had learned a lesson I was meant to learn, and in front of me was a register that had several other 'lives' on it. I feel like there was much more to this discussion, but I cannot remember it. From this point I can fully remember again. I asked the question "where am I" (I didn't think anyone was around me either) and I heard the answer in my ears, but it was in my own voice "you are in the place between lives". I wasn't concerned, because I knew I wasn't dead.
I was given the choice to stay here if I wanted. I started weighing out my options. I was extremely curious about what there was to find in this place. As far as I could see, everything was black all around me, but I knew there was much much more. I also never really had any great desires in a worldly sense. Most things people worry about on a daily and even lifetime scale basis seemed very petty and unimportant. I've always felt very alien in my body as well. Never coming back to it didn't seem like much of a loss to me. (I should not, I am not a depressed person, nor do I care to die in my regular life) Then I considered my family and specifically my mother, who just wouldn't understand my sudden unexpected death. I could see and feel the pain that my unnecessary absence would cause. I considered how long I would have to be left on Earth before returning here, and I heard about 60 years. (again in my own voice) I considered what 60 years felt like, and it passed incredibly fast! I could see little blurbs of events, but it all happened at such amazing speed it was pointless to try and follow any of them. To myself I said "It will feel much longer back there" but the part of my that felt the rapid passing said "60 years? That's nothing! I'll be back here before I know it!"
Then I felt a powerful
rush. I thought I was in my room and tried to turn over. I found I could roll
in 3 dimensions, and tried to go through my wall. As I was floating here upside
down I suddenly and seamlessly arose in my body. The realization of what had
just happened was extremely overpowered by a sense of shear terror. I was very
confused, and dissatisfied at returning. I was also horrified at the fact that
I didn't know what had just happened to me. The feeling of fear here is very
difficult to quantify, due to its extremity.
Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience? No The only 2 drinks of alcohol I had were several hours previous and not very stiff. I was sober when this occurred.
Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes Its hard to describe the feeling of freedom, and the concept of time. I also feel as though portions of this were almost amnesia tic.
At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event? No
What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience? Very high, I felt more conscious then I usually do. I was completely aware and alert to what was happening
Was the experience dream like in any way? No, I dream very often and have a thick notebook of dreams from the last several years I have written down. I am very familiar with dreaming, and this was not even close to it.
Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body? Yes I felt free from my actual body.
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Curious, peaceful, very brief sadness for my family's pain. It was mostly positive, and a part of it felt instructive during the hazy area.
Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises? I could hear weird noises when I was vibrating, and also my own voice audibly.
LOCATION DESCRIPTION: Did you recognize any familiar locations or any locations from familiar religious teachings or encounter any locations inhabited by incredible or amazing creatures? No Everything was void and black. I didn't see anyone else, but I could feel the presence of others.
Did you see a light? No
Did you meet or see any other beings? Uncertain I did feel like someone was almost instructing or explaining when I was hazy, but its very hard to remember.
Did you experiment while out of the body or in another, altered state? Yes
I tried to fly around a little bit and go through a wall, but I still had my eyes shut, and couldn't see anything when I was in my room.
Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later? No
Did you notice how your 5 senses were working, and if so, how were they different? Yes I didn't smell or taste anything, but I could see (even with my eyes shut), and I could certainly feel there was no pain, sound was normal except as already noted.
Did you have any sense of altered space or time? Yes Measuring time here was akin to measuring an inch in a place where everything is everywhere and at the same spot all at the same time.
Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose? Uncertain I know I have a purpose, and I have learned 'something'. Nothing in the immediate region of my life came with any sudden revelations before this though.
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No
Did you become aware of future events? Uncertain I could see a multitude of events in my future life, but they all passed too quickly to follow, and most were in the distant future.
Were you involved in or aware of a decision regarding your return to the body? No Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience? Uncertain I have had similar experiences to this one, after the fact.
Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience? Yes Its pointless to care about things that don't matter (i.e. money, power, mistakes, failure). There is something to learn about everything. Physical death in this life is probably not the first time nor the last time I've experienced it, so don't worry about it. You can't force events to happen, they all occur as they should.
How has the experience affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices? Career choices? I've become less critical of people, and more tolerant. I certainly plan to choose a career field that does not require me to be angry at people's minor mistakes. Where as in the military everything is looked at as a life or death mistake, even that seems unimportant now.
Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes I have been trying to recreate this experience, and have had several similar ones since. I feel like I am moving towards being a better person due to this experience.
Have you shared this experience with others? Yes Some were receptive, others doubtful and skeptical. I know I would have been very skeptical before it happened to me, so it doesn't surprise me to hear it from others.
What emotions did you experience following your experience? Terror. Absolute fear and terror for several hours after the experience.
What was the best and worst part of your experience? The freedom to do anything and go anywhere I pleased was amazing. The worst part was upon waking, while i was out of body, I felt great. When I got back I was very afraid.
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience? Yes multiple times I have woke up unable to move (I've had this happen before this experience as well), when I would move my hand, I could see my physical hand lying still, but a dark purple and translucent hand would sometimes come out of my arm. I can also feel it against my face if I poke myself with it.