Home Page
Share ExperienceOBE Stories
SOBE Stories

Marcus P's Experience

Experience description:   

Hallo, I am writing because I want to give an account of an NDE (though this term bothers me a bit) which is somewhat different from others. I would also like to bring up a very important point which no one talks about, that is to say, memory.

My name is Philippe, 30 years old, and I had this experience more than two years ago. This experience came about without accidental trauma or coma, and was as follows. I was in bed, where I had lain down towards midnight. From midnight until eight in the morning I could not get to sleep, my heart was beating a bit more rapidly than normal but this was nothing alarming (I am not a cardiac case, I am in perfect health).

I was lying in a foetal position when suddenly I was thrust into a tunnel of light. This light was full of love and energy, not dazzling. I was not a body, I had no more body, I was consciousness in its pure state, bathed with light. Time did not exist any more,  just an eternal present. No more thoughts. But the most remarkable thing was that I had no more memory. I no longer had any memory of my identity, my sex or my past, I did not even have the memory that I had been a human being of flesh and blood. I was this light, no body, no thoughts, no past, no sense of time. I saw no angel or bodily form because I did not even know what a body is any more. I lost all individuality, merging with a form of  universal cosmic energy, which to my mind is our true source of being, nature. I think this is where we come from, but also where we are supposed to return, without ego, without memory. In most accounts people describe the tunnel in a dualistic way; they are here and then the tunnel is there. But we are the tunnel of light, this light is the source of our consciousness and life in a more encompassing way, rather like a cinema screen where all manifestations of life can be projected. Then, when the moment came for me to become fused with the light, I became afraid that I would not be able to return. In retrospect, I think I was still attached to my body, my senses, my memory. It was the fear of losing my individuality. Because I was still not ready to let go of my ego completely.

This experience is of a kind with other experiences. just as enriching and revolutionary, which throw into doubt our approach to life, concerning the idea of time and of duality. I must be clear that I have no religion, I belong to no spiritual current, even though I have made a study of some, such as Hinduism, Buddhism or even Zen. I have practiced solitary meditation, however, at home, since I was 25 years old. I have also practiced a liquid fast of a week's duration once a year for the last four years.

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes les mots ne sont pas assez forts pour communiquer l'amour

Yes, words are not strong enough to communicate the love.

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event? No

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? pendant toute l'expérience

Throughout the experience.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal

If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain: pendant toute l'expérience

Throughout the experience.

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)? No

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)? Yes il y avait un silence qui ne peut être exprimé avec des mots

Yes. There was a silence which cannot be expressed in words.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body? Yes

What emotions did you feel during the experience? une libération, un grand bien être, l'infini, l'amour

A liberation, a great wellbeing, infinity, love.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure? Yes ma conscience se déplaçait dans le tunnel et s'approchait de la lumière, plus je m'approchais de la lumière plus l'amour était grand

Yes. My consciousness was transferred  to the tunnel and drew nearer to the light. The closer I got to the light the greater was the love.

Did you see a light?
Yes une lumière remplie d'amour, qui pour moi est la source de la vie et de notre conscience

Yes. A light filled with love, which for me is the source of life and of our consciousness.

Did you meet or see any other beings? No

Did you experience a review of past events in your life? No

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later? No

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions? No

Did you have any sense of altered space or time? Yes le temps et l'espace n'existe plus. J'étais dans un vide rempli d'énergie et de possibilité.Je vivais l'éternité de l'instant présent

Yes, time and space no longer exist. I was in a void filled with energy and possibility. I lived the eternity of the present moment.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose? Yes Cette lumiére est la base de notre conscience et de toutes formes de vie. Mais cet état peut être vécu sans attendre la mort. Il est notre état naturel.

Yes. This light is the basis of our consciousness and of all forms of life. But this condition can be experienced without waiting until we die. It is our natural state.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Yes si je franchissais la limite, alors je n'aurai pas pu revenir

Yes. If I crossed the boundary, then I would not have been able to return.

Did you become aware of future events? No

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience? No

Have you shared this experience with others? Yes 2 ans, ils sont sceptiques car j'ai vécu cette expérience sans faire de coma

Yes. After 2 years. They were skeptical, since I went through the experience without being in a coma.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? No

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real très réelle car je n'avais jamais eu l'esprit aussi lucide

Experience was definitely real , very real, as my mind had never been so lucid.

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you? lorsque j'étais le plus proche de la lumière, jai l'impression que je pouvais fusionner avec la lumière au point de m'y dissoudre

When I was at the closest to the light, I had the feeling that I could merge with the light to the point of dissolving myself in it.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience? Experience was definitely real de la même maière que deux jours après, c'est à dire une grande lucidité

Experience was definitely real , just as it was two days later, that is, a great lucidity.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes Je ressens plus d'amour, je suis beaucoup heureux, je n'ai plus peur de la mort. Je me rends compte de la chance que nous avons d'être en vie et profite de chaque moment

Yes. I feel more love, I am much happier, no longer afraid of death. I realize how lucky we are to be alive, and I make the most of every moment.

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience? No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience? No

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes