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Marcia T's Experience

Experience description:   

I had a serious, but undiagnosed illness in my late teens and then for years afterwards had a multitude of symptoms from every system of my body, that gradually got worse as the years passed.  I've always been psychic, premonitions, a bit of telepathy, but during the illness the psychic experiences became very much more vivid and very, very frequent.  When I was 30 despite the illness I started training as a student nurse.  The first out of body experience occurred in the middle of a ward while I was working. I was sitting in chair next to the patient and chatting to them.  In the middle of the conversation I suddenly found myself looking down at the top of my head.  I was still talking to the patient.  I then saw myself get up from the chair and walk across the bay of the ward to the nurses station.  The position from where I was seeing myself didn't change, that is I remained above the chair while I watched myself walk away.  When I was walking past the nurses station I found myself abruptly back in my self. I had a slight sensation as if something had hit me. I can't remember whether it was in the back or the front. I felt jittery and a little disorientated and my heart was beating fast.  I went to one of the empty side rooms to, well, pull myself together.   

The second experience happened years later in 1997.  I had finally been diagnosed as having a cyst (tumor) half the size of my abdomen, crushing my organs, obviously very slow growing and very life threatening.  I was living with my parents at the time and was waiting an operation.  I wasn't sure whether I wanted the operation but knew I would die with out it in the near future.  I couldn't understand why I was still alive with something of that size inside me crushing my adrenal gland, kidney and pancreas and pushing everything out of place and wondered if I really should be dead.  Anyway, I went to bed and went to sleep.  It was dark outside and the curtains were drawn.  I woke up during the night.  There was enough light to see the details of the room in the dark. I got out of bed and walked across the room to go to the toilet.  I tried to open the door and couldn't.  I looked back over to the bed and saw the shape of a body covered by blankets in the bed.  As soon as I saw that I found myself back in myself.  I was gasping and in the middle of quickly sitting bolt upright.  I had a sensation of something hitting me hard in the solar plexus (just below the sternum).  I got out of bed and had a look around, tried the door etc, no everything was normal.  I went back to bed and went to sleep.  Incidentally, I was the only one sleeping in that room. I was sleeping in a queen size bed. Although puzzled at the time the experience didn't upset or disturb me.  I was more disturbed by the diagnosis.

Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?     No      

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? No      

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          Yes     Yes, the illness, although I didn't know it was life threatening.

What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience?           For the first one I was fully conscious, or at least believed I was. I believe I may have been experiencing an altered state of consciousness for along time at that point and didn't realize it.  Even though the tumor would have been large when I was a student nurse I couldn't feel it, I couldn't even feel it when it was discovered four years later. I should have also been in agonizing pain around the clock with it, but wasn't, although there was intermittent, sever pain, it wasn't all the time.  I think my body image or ability to sense my body had changed and perhaps I was experiencing some sort of illusion of having a normal body image. I also experienced occasional tactile sensory distortions and sometimes felt as if I was physically much, much taller.  

In the second experience I was asleep as far as I know.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?   Neither experiences felt at all dream like.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Yes     In the first experience when I saw myself walking away everything looked perfectly normal.

In the second experience I couldn't see myself, but did see the shape of my body in bed. The room was quite light because I could see the details of the furniture and the pictures on the wall.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            It's a bit hard to remember.  I know that with both experiences I was unnerved a little afterwards.  I can't remember being frightened or any particular emotion during either experience.

Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises?           No

LOCATION DESCRIPTION:  Did you recognize any familiar locations or any locations from familiar religious teachings or encounter any locations inhabited by incredible or amazing creatures?    No response      I didn't seem to go anywhere, except that my body and consciousness weren't in the same location.

Did you see a light?           No      

Did you meet or see any other beings?           No      

Did you experiment while out of the body or in another, altered state? No      

Apart from trying to open the bedroom door.

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          Yes     Well, yes, obviously I could hear the nurses at the nursing station chatting. Their conversation continued during and after the experience, no change.

Did you notice how your 5 senses were working, and if so, how were they different?          Uncertain            I don't remember feeling anything or smelling anything, but I could see and hear perfectly except not from the point of view of where my body was.

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   No      

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    No      

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?             Yes     The bedroom door.

Did you become aware of future events?       No       Not during out of body experiences but many, many premonitions over a number of years around that time.

Were you involved in or aware of a decision regarding your return to the body?       No       Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?   No       Continued to have an exceptional level of psychic events occurring.

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?   No      

How has the experience affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices? Career choices?       Because I had so many things happening these two events didn't change anything.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?         No      

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes     I was speaking to my brother on the phone about it this evening.  He is having what he believes are out of body experiences, but totally different to anything I've experienced.  He's able to lucid dream, I've nevr done that, so don't know what's going on, he said he's had loads of these experiences recently and has seen lights and what sounds like his aura.

What emotions did you experience following your experience?  Bewildered, frustrated.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      Finding everything was normal afterwards.

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?        These experiences really happened.  I always thought I would be scarred but wasn't. I might have had one much earlier, many years befor when I think I had a cardiac arrest in hospital and found my self standing at the end of my bed looking at myself.  However, i'm not sure if that really happened.  I'm absolutely sure these other two happened and believe my consciousness was temporarily not in my body.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No      

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes     As well as I can remember.