Lisa I's Experience

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Experience description:   

            Four years ago, I was helping my friend decorate her Christmas tree.  When I was young, Christmas' were very scary for me due to all the (family) drinking and fighting and therefore I had always been nervous at Christmas time.  But I wanted this particular year to 'not' feel that way so I began helping my friend.  As she put all the lights on the tree, I unwrapped the various ornaments, mostly all angels that her mom had made.  I then stood up to start decorating the tree.  As I approached the tree, I found myself having a hard time trying to put the first piece on.  All of a sudden I had a flash.  I saw a baby (about 3 months old) all alone crying in a car-seat on the couch of our living room in our home (the house that I grew up in).  I saw it from the top corner of the room, the baby, the Christmas tree, and the whole room and "knowing" (but not seeing) that the 'family' ie grown-ups were drinking and arguing in the other room (kitchen).   

I then sat down and began to feel all the feelings I had as a child (how scared I was throughout my childhood).  My friend and I talked for awhile and then she drove me home--I didn't finish decorating the tree. 

When I got home, I started to wonder why I would have had a flash about a three month old baby and then I realized that because I saw the Christmas Tree in our living room with all the lights, I realized it really was probably me because I would have been 3 months old at Christmas time because I was born on September 22nd.   

I tried to tell my doctor but he gave me some medication for psychosis which he later took me off of shortly after that. 

Since then I have actually had a nde where I was welcomed by my deceased relatives and started reading other nde reports on your site and I have started wondering if I may have had an out-of-body experience that one day when I was with my friend trying to decorate her tree.  I have read many of your nde accounts, but I have never came across anything like what I described to you (when I was 3 months old). 

I hope you do not think this sounds strange and if you have possibly ever run across something like this before, would you please let me know?  I just don't want to be thought of as crazy because it wasn't like I would have been dying (ie at 3 months), just really scared.  Do you think this sort of thing could actually happen?  ie that a person is so 'scared' that they leave their body?  and/or if you have ever heard of this happening to anyone? 

Thank you

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? No

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?
          Uncertain      No, I was just trying to decorate my friend's Christmas tree

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?    When I saw the flash of myself crying as an infant from above.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?    More consciousness and alertness than normal

If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain:
            Just that I can remember the details of the room: ie the couch, the TV, the Christmas tree with all the lights, the lamp, only from above.

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?  Yes     Everything was just as solid as real life, just from a higher perspective.

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?
            Uncertain      I did not 'hear' anything from the kitchen; just a "knowing" that the adults were in the kitchen drinking/fighting, and seeing but not hearing myself crying below.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     Yes

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            Extreme fright and peace

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          Uncertain      After the flash, I "did" remember all the old furniture in our living room when I was a child, the couch, TV, lamp, etc...  My parents and other family members (adults) did drink every Christmas fighting/etc... and that 'I actually would have been 3 months old at the time because it was Christmas and my birthday is on September 22nd.

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Uncertain      just watching myself crying in normal time

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?     Uncertain            When I was younger I seemed to know that there was something different about our family.  I seemed to be 'the observer'.  I seemed to want just to love and my family was very argumentative and violent.  I seemed to know that they just didn't 'get it' and that they didn't "want" to get it.  I talked to God every night and when they had their drunken arguments about religion I knew God wouldn't want people to hurt each other like they did.  I seemed to know things like not to drink or do drugs, to watch for patterns, that I was going through all I did for a reason.  That I needed to learn all I could so I could help others.  To be careful how you treat people.  Not to learn what my family was teaching and that I would have to wait until I got older to figure it all out...and something to do about the number 36 which seemed like an age...?  Just different things like that.  I just figured I had God because He knew I didn't have anyone.  (My twin brother eventually committed suicide--he became a heavy drug user, and my older brother is now in hiding due to the unlawful things he has done--so I don't see him either).

Did you become aware of future events?       Uncertain
            Based on my actual life growing up, I wonder if this is the reason I seemed to know things or if it was just that I got good answers when I listened to God?

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?     Uncertain      Just very sensitive to anyone getting hurt or anyone hurting someone.

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes     I told my friend who was with me when I tried to decorate her tree.  She said it all made sense because she wondered how I survived growing up.  She always wondered if I believed in God.  At first I forgot just how much I did but it all came back to me.

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:            Experience was probably not real         My friend seemed to understand, because she was there when I had the flash of seeing myself when I was a baby, but when I told my doctor, he put me on psychotic medication right away, but then took me off soon after.  So I haven't talked about it other than with my friend for fear I will be perceived as a lunatic!

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?    By having a flash of seeing myself as an infant helped me to understand how I could always see things from a different perspective and how I was always 'trying' to do the right thing ie by not hurting anyone, b/c I always thought that's what you were suppose to do, I thought that was the goal.  Now after experiencing that, I now see how my brothers and the rest of the family didn't understand--because they could not see themselves from another perspective, they could not see how their actions affected other people.  So I think it must have really helped me.  And I thank God for that!

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:            Experience was definitely real            Definitely real because it was so clear, and because of how I felt growing up by having a different perceptive, an ability to see from other's points of view.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?           Uncertain      I imagine if that never happened to me at such an early age (but of course only remembering it at 36) then I probably would not be a caring person, I would probably well actually I have been told that based on my upbringing that I am lucky I am alive, and that I am not in a psych-ward, or a drug or alcoholic.

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?           
Uncertain      I just always believed in God.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?         
I wonder if anyone else has ever experienced having a 'flash-back' of an obe, or any comments...please...

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?         Uncertain      I just really wonder how or why that happened to me.  I know what I saw yet wonder how that could happen.  I just wish there was someone else who has ever experienced anything like that so I could talk to them.  For example, how is it that I saw myself (when I was 36) and NOT "at the time"?  That part is the part I don't really get at all??????

Are there any other questions we could ask to help you communicate your experience?      I can't think of any.  Thank you for listening.