IT WAS PITCH BLACK AND I WAS CALLING OUT "IS ANYBODY THERE, WHERE AM I" REPEATEDLY. I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH TIME HAD PASSED, SUDDENLY I STARTED CRYING HYSTERICALLY ASKING GOD WHY I DIED AND WHAT I DIED FROM AND WHY HE TOOK ME ON MY HONEYMOON (WHICH I REALLY WAS ON MY HONEYMOON) AND WHY I WAS SO YOUNG, I SAID TO GOD "I KNEW I WAS GOING TO DIE YOUNG BUT WHY ON OUR HONEYMOON, WHY NOW. I ALSO ASKED HIM HOW JOE (HUSBAND) WOULD DEAL WITH MY DEATH ON OUR HONEYMOON, I WAS SO WORRIED ABOUT WHAT HE WOULD DO, I FELT SADNESS FOR HIM AND FOR MY FAMILY BUT MOSTLY HIM.
I COULD HEAR DOORS SLAMMING AND MUFFLED VOICES BUT I FELT I WAS ABOVE THE SOUNDS THEY WERE VERY FAR AWAY. I THOUGHT THE DOOR SLAMMING AND VOICES WERE PEOPLE PRONOUNCING ME DEAD, THOUGH I COULDN'T FULLY HEAR THEM. I'M STILL CRYING HYSTERICALLY SAYING OVER AND OVER AND OVER "WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY" THEN SUDDENLY I FELT LIKE I WAS LIFTED UP THROUGH THE DARKNESS ALMOST LIKE A TUNNEL OR BLACK HOLE.
I FELT THE PRESENCE BUT COULDN'T SEE MY DECEASED GRANDMOTHER EVEN THOUGH I KNOW IT WAS HER EMBRACING ME I SAID HI TO HER AND ASKED HER WHY BUT SUDDENLY AT THAT POINT I DIDN'T CARE WHY I HAD DIED. I CRIED HARDER THEN BEFORE, HARDER THAN EVER BEFORE IN MY ENTIRE LIFE BECAUSE THE FEELING WAS SO BEAUTIFUL, I CAN NOT EVEN EXPRESS IN WORDS THE FEELING THAT OVER CAME MY ENTIRE BEING. I KEPT SAYING THANK YOU FOR TAKING ME THANK YOU, THANK YOU. I KNEW I WAS IN HEAVEN I NEVER FELT OR EXPERIENCED THIS FEELING EVER!!! I KEPT SAYING OVER AND OVER AND OVER "IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL, IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL, IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL. I DIDN'T WANT IT TO END.
SUDDENLY A BAD FEELING CAME ALMOST LIKE I WAS GOING TO HELL ALTHOUGH THE FEELING WASN'T AS STRONG AS WHEN I WAS IN HEAVEN AND IT SEEMED TO NOT LAST VERY LONG BUT DURING THE MOMENT I SCREAMED NO, NO. THEN WENT BACK TO THE MOST BEAUTIFUL PLACE IN THE WORLD WHERE I SOBBED AND SOBBED AND REPEATED " HOW BEAUTIFUL, THANK-YOU" OVER AND OVER.
THEN I WOKE UP ON THE BATHROOM FLOOR NOT KNOWING HOW I GOT THERE BUT THINKING I WAS TRIPPING ON ACID AND THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED TO ME. BUT THAT IS NOT THE CASE I WASN'T TRIPPING ON ACID AT ALL. I REALIZED I HAD MIGHT HAVE DIED. I WAS VERY MOODY THE REST OF THE VACATION AND KIND OF SCARED THAT I WAS GOING TO DROP DEAD AT ANY MINUTE, THAT WHAT HAD HAPPENED WAS A SIGN I WAS GOING TO DIE. ON THE FLIGHT HOME 5 DAYS LATER I WAS JUST WAITING FOR THE PLANE TO CRASH AND EVERYONE DIE INCLUDING MYSELF AND FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER I WASN'T AFRAID TO FLY. ON THE WAY TO THE HONEYMOON I WAS PETRIFIED TO FLY, ON THE WAY HOME I WANTED IT TO CRASH AND WAS WAITING FOR IT TO HAPPEN BECAUSE I KNOW THERE IS TREMENDOUS HAPPINESS UP THERE AND I WANTED TO FEEL IT AGAIN.
Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes
What was it about the experience that makes it hard to communicate? IT WAS THE BEST FEELING I EVER FELT IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE I CAN NOT PUT IT IN WORDS
What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience? I WAS NOT CONSCIOUS.
Was the experience dream like in any way? NO!!
Did you experience a separation of consciousness from your body? Yes
Describe your appearance or form apart from your body: I FELT LIKE A WAS IN A DIFFERENT DIMENSION.
What emotions did you feel during the experience? FIRST SADNESS, THEN GREAT PEACEFUL AND HAPPINESS.
Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises? DOORS SLAMMING AND MUFFLED VOICES
Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure? Yes
Did you see a light? No
Did you meet or see any other beings? Yes
Describe: MY DECEASED GRANDMOTHER - I HUGGED HER AND FELT HER HUG ME BACK BUT COULD NOT SEE HER. I ASKED HER WHY I DIED.
Did you experience a review of past events in your life? No
Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later? Yes
Describe: SEE #8
Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions? Yes
Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose? No
Did you become aware of future events? No
Were you involved in or aware of a decision to return to the body? Uncertain
Describe: I KNEW I DIDN'T WANT TO GO BACK AND I DON'T REMEMBER HOW I GOT BACK.
Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience? No
Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience? Yes
Describe: I'M SCARED I'M GOING TO DROP DEAD ANY MINUTE.
Has the experience affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices etc.? Career choices? SEE # 21
Have you shared this experience with others? Yes
Describe: THEY TOLD ME IT WAS A SIGN THAT I SHOULD CHANGE MY LIFE STYLE OR I MIGHT DIE
What emotions did you experience following your experience? SCARED
What was the best and worst part of your experience? WORST - SADNESS OF MY DEATH - BEST - HOW BEAUTIFUL THE FEELING OF BEING IN HEAVEN WAS
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience? No
Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes