I was very depressed at the time. I was unhappy in my marriage and generally felt that I was a complete failure in everything that I had ever attempted. I felt my life had no meaning and that I had completely wasted it. As I fell asleep that night I remember thinking to myself that I had never really experienced true love, either in my loving someone else (other than my children) or in someone truly loving me. I remember specifically wondering to myself what that type of love must feel like...and regretting and feeling sad that I would never know. Sometime toward morning I suddenly "awakened" or rather felt that I had become "untethered" from my body and I was rapidly speeding upwards. The feeling of detachment from my body was surreal as I felt I had no weight or anchor. I was totally free of any physical constraints (like gravity).
was rapidly speeding upward I had an overwhelming sense of a complete and total
love and acceptance and I immediately said to myself "Oh, this is what it's
like". I immediately knew it was God's love for me. It was the most wonderful
emotion I had ever experienced and I felt free of any earthly attachments
whatsoever. Nothing mattered anymore other than a desperate longing to remain in
this "love". However, just as I was completely rejoicing in this understanding
and acceptance that was flooding every fiber of my consciousness I became
suddenly aware of a thought that completely stopped me momentarily. "But my
children", I lamented. However, just as quickly as that thought flashed in my
mind it was answered with a comforting assurance and knowledge that "They'll be
fine" and I was ready and eager to leave everything behind and continue the
rapid ascent. Then I suddenly felt a gravitational "pull" and I was again heavy
and in my body in bed. I woke up. I was flooded with a most wonderful sense of
peace and lay awake re-examining all that had occurred. Most especially I
re-lived over and over that sense and feeling of total and overwhelming love and
acceptance and the awareness that "God" knew me intimately and "loved" me.
Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? No
At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event? No
At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? From the moment I realized I was speeding upward.
How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal
If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain: From the moment I realized I was speeding upward.
Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)? Uncertain No vision.
Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?
Yes I didn't hear, I just knew and understood in my mind.
Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body? Yes
What emotions did you feel during the experience? Great happiness, acceptance, joy, exaltation.
Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure? No
Did you see a light? No
Did you meet or see any other beings? No
Did you experience a review of past events in your life? No
Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later? No
Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions? No
Did you have any sense of altered space or time? Yes Everything was very rapid.
Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose? Yes God knows us intimately and loves us with a love unknown to mere mortals.
Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No
Did you become aware of future events? No
Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience? No
Have you shared this experience with others? Yes I've shared it with 3 family members. Two seemed skeptical and thought if was just a "dream". One understood the importance and significance.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Yes Just knew that some people had near death experiences and that doctors generally discounted their recollections.
How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened: Experience was definitely real My recollection of the experience has never altered and remains very vivid today.
Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you? Yes, the overwhelming sense of love for me individually.
How do you currently view the reality of your experience: Experience was definitely real This was the only time I ever really felt any communication with "God" or an answer to a prayer or a question.
Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience? No
Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes Strengthened.
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience? No
Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience? No
Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience? Yes
Are there any other questions we could ask to help you communicate your experience? No