Late winter 2001,late night: I was 32. (this experience is slightly embarrassing and much more personal, as it occurred during a sexual encounter. I will attempt to relay it delicately.) I had been dating a person about 2 months and had previously been physically intimate with them. this occasion it was dark in the room, no light source-clock, nightlight, etc. we were engaged in intercourse, in a missionary position with myself under his body. suddenly I was directly above our bodies. however, I could see us without a light source. It was akin to using a flashlight in complete darkness- the available vision field is acutely outlined with complete black surrounding it. I recall noticing this was odd as we weren't bathed in any glow or light. I did have a type of sensation of being held in that close proximity. not tethered as such, but not having the farther away viewpoint of the childhood experience. my vantage point was so close, I could have touched his back from above. I could see his torso and upper body, with my head, neck shoulders and arms visible below. the level of visual detail was extremely acute. Again I could hear sounds, and perceive his movement; but my face was in only one expression with no movement or sound. my eyes were closed. again, suddenly I was back in my body with no profound awareness of the act of returning. I'm also certain this all lasted mere seconds, but the details observed would normally take me much longer to asses and retain. this experience was much more profound and confusing to me considering the situation in which it occurred. contrary to my first experience, I had no uncertainty this had occurred, and had no fear experienced previously, but I was perplexed by what may have 'triggered' it. Again this memory is as vivid as when it happened, almost 20 years later.

January 2015,evening (about 8pm): I was 45 years old. contrary to earlier ones, this experience was violent and extremely frightening, which afterwards kept me from sleeping. I was alone in my home, in bed working on a crossword puzzle. I had a nightstand with a lamp on the right side of my bed. there was an antique dresser with a large mirror against the wall directly across from the foot of my bed. I could look into the mirror and observe myself sitting in bed. suddenly I felt the sensation of being pulled upwards from behind-in approximately the torso area. I liken it to how a person would pick up a rag doll- the limbs and head falling downward. suddenly I stopped. this time I could feel some type of boundary on my back, as if the ceiling had stopped my ascent. This all occurred at an incredible speed. I could feel the acceleration as I went upwards. It was so sudden and fast, with physical sensations- this time I felt very frightened. I recall being in a corner point of view above my bed, looking down on myself and my bedroom. the detail is incredible- the crossword on my lap, pen in my hand. the position of furniture in the room. the room illuminated by the lamp, my clothes on the floor by the bed. the antique dresser with my jewelry box sitting open on it. It's still startling to me how detailed it all was. However, this is where it gets very scary- something began to violently shake me back and forth. I could still feel the boundary against my back, keeping me from being pulled upwards further. I could see the rooms items blurred by this action. again I can only liken it to shaking a rag doll from side to side in a quick violent motion. I could physically feel all of this motion. suddenly I was being pushed downwards towards my body. it is difficult to describe the acceleration at which this occurred. it almost seemed as if it was not normally possible, as if I was descending, while the bed was ascending to meet me. I remember thinking I was going so fast that when I hit the bed it would shatter and I would go through the floor into the ground- so great was the force of my descent! I was certain I was going to be killed by this process. then just as suddenly I was looking through my own eyes at the crossword puzzle in my lap. I looked into the mirror to make sure I was reflected and really in my body. I sat there bewildered, shaken- extremely scared. I could not sleep at all that night, as I was afraid everything would occur again if I was in my bed. This experience was totally different then the others. firstly- I had physical sensations. also this time I felt as if I was being controlled by an outside force. I felt fear rather then the relative calmness associated with the first two experiences. also, I was alone this time. I am unequivocally certain of this experience. The violence felt was extreme. it still causes me distress even today in recall. soon after I moved into another bedroom in my house and have not slept in that room since.

I have never attempted any kind of meditation or other practice to induce out of body experiences. Thank you for giving me somewhere to share these experiences without judgments.

Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?      No     

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words?        No     

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?       No     

What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience?    1979- alert, acute awareness of surroundings, high level of awareness of additional persons.

2001- alert, acute visual awareness of persons, very low awareness of physical surroundings.

2015- extremely alert, acute awareness of visual and physical surroundings.

            Was the experience dream like in any way? no for all 3

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?         Uncertain           1979 - I was unaware of any physical appearance of my out of body from my vantage point. I was just seeing it-like an invisible observer in the room.

2001- I was aware I could touch if I chose to, however I did not nor did I see any appendages of my out of body

2015- I was aware of my body's dimensions and sensations away from my physical body.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?           1979 - none during the experience. I was just impartially observing.

2001- I felt startled and puzzled at seeing my own face.

2015- extreme fear

Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises?           1979- nothing unusual

2001- nothing unusual

2015- too terrified to recall

LOCATION DESCRIPTION:  Did you recognize any familiar locations or any locations from familiar religious teachings or encounter any locations inhabited by incredible or amazing creatures?           No     

Did you see a light?         No     

Did you meet or see any other beings?         No     

Did you experiment while out of the body or in another, altered state?    No     

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?        No     

Did you notice how your 5 senses were working, and if so, how were they different?  Yes    1979- my vision was acute. my hearing was lessened. I was not aware of taste, smell and touch.

2001- my vision was very acute, hearing was lessened. I was my sense of touch felt available to me. I was not aware of taste and smell.

2015- my vision was acute, my sense of touch was highly acute. i do not recall taste, smell or sound.

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?           Yes    in all 3 experiences , time did not seem to exist. they all felt as if I was just 'there', in the moment.

2015- this experience I was aware of a distorted sense of distances and speed. the distance from myself to the bed seemed far, yet contained within the room. yet the speed of ascent, acceleration and descent was unexplainably fast.

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?           No     

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?              Yes    2015- I felt a boundary on my back as I was pulled upwards. to my reasoning, it was the physical ceiling of my bedroom. I did not cross it, however I felt an ominous sense if whatever force was pulling me had succeeded in getting me past the boundary, it would have been torturous.

Did you become aware of future events?           Uncertain     If I think about a person, they will then contact me. this increased tremendously after the 2015 experience. the accuracy is 98%, as some are dead.

Were you involved in or aware of a decision regarding your return to the body?     No      Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience? Uncertain     I have strong feelings of empathy towards some people, and at times can feel their emotions. I can think of people and they will contact me shortly afterwards. I met a person in 2015 and was actually able to observe a physical 'rope' of light connecting us. it looked like a lightning bolt tethered between us. this was outside in a parking lot as we were walking towards each other. we had talked previously, but this was the initial physical meeting between us.

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience?         Yes    I have an enhanced interest in the possibility of alien life. my interest in death, and an existence beyond such, has changed from an acute fear to a desire to understand and empathize. i am considerably more accepting of fantastic and out of ordinary accounts of others experiences.

after the 2015 incident, I've come to believe that although we have no physical body to help shield us in out of body experiences, we can strengthen our spiritual body to withstand forces that exist in other realms. I do not want to get to the spiritual plain and have a spiritual body with no level of power to shield my soul. there are immense forces out there to contend with.

How has the experience affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices? Career choices?    I am more empathetic and understanding. I think there a slight anxiety of a reoccurrence of the frightening 2015 experience. my acceptance of a higher power has become more solidified. my career has not changed.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes   

Have you shared this experience with others?           Yes    my  4 children were astonished. they were supportive. i believe it allowed them to share some strange experiences they have had, although 3 of them have not had out of body experiences. my second son had ARDS in 2012, and had an out of body near death experience in the Seattle hospital where he actually walked the halls with a person who had died in the huge fire there in the early 20th century.

What emotions did you experience following your experience? 1979- confusion, disbelief, denial.

2001- intrigue, calmness, acceptance.

2015- fear.

What was the best and worst part of your experience? 1979- the visual details were amazing. the uncertainty of reality was difficult.

2001- the intimacy of the situation was calming. the ability to see myself so closely was unsettling.