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Brenda M's Experience

Experience description:   

Very early one morning, the sun was just rising, I awoke in my crib because I heard an odd loud noise coming from the living room.  I climbed out of my crib.  In the hallway, I could look into my parents' bedroom and saw them sleeping.  I continued walking down the hall towards the living room.  The living room looked both normal and abnormal.  The sun was shining through the windows, but there was also an unearthly light.  The noise was painfully loud once I was in the living room.  I saw what looked like my dad's desk lamp on the floor in the middle of the living room, but it was more like a floor lamp than a desk lamp, it was very tall.  The noise was emanating from this lamp.  I could now discern that it was saying words, not just screeching, but because I was only three years old, I had neither the knowledge or experience to really understand what it was saying.  Something it said frightened me and I fled back to my bedroom, climbed back into my crib and fell asleep.  This experience was far more vivid and real than a dream and I have remembered it vividly down through the years.

At the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event?         Uncertain            The event occurred in the early morning hours.  Later, when my parents and I awoke, I had a severe inner ear infection. I am guessing I had a life-threatening fever during the NDE.

Was the experience difficult to express in words?   Uncertain      I can explain what happened, but the feelings were complex and deep, not entirely pleasant, but very meaningful.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?    More consciousness and alertness than normal    I was acutely conscious of everything through the entire experience.      Although I was only three years old, I have remembered this experience in minute detail down through the years.  Very unusual.  I have spent a lot of time pondering the experience.

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.    My vision and my memory of what I saw are extraordinary.  I can remember what my parents looked like in their bed.  I remember how vividly I saw even the shelves and cupboards in the living room that morning.

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.    Like vision, my hearing was also hypersensitive.  In fact, sounds were painful.  At least, the sound emanating from the device in the living room was painful to me.

Did you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that your consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body?    Uncertain   My mother says I was not capable of climbing out of my crib, so although I didn't feel disconnected from my body, I think maybe, in fact, I had left my body when I left my crib.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            Both intense curiosity and intense fear.  

Did you pass into or through a tunnel?           Uncertain      I "walked" through the hallway that lead from my bedroom to the livingroom, but I was heading toward an unearthly light, and sound.

Did you see an unearthly light? Yes     The sun was coming through the windows in the living room, but there was also an unearthly light emanating from the room itself.

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice?            I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin    The tall radio/lamp I encountered in the living room spoke to me.

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings?         Yes    I saw my parents sleeping in their bedroom and then I saw the tall radio/lamp in the living room which spoke to me.

Did you become aware of past events in your life during your experience?    Uncertain      I think the radio/lamp spoke to me, but more about the future than the past, but I am guessing on that.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world?          No      

Did time seem to speed up or slow down?     No      

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything?            Everything about myself or others            I didn't understand everything, but I clearly learned something, I just wasn't sure what, perhaps simply the need to get back into my body.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? Uncertain      The tall radio/lamp clearly did not want me to remain in the living room and I think it scared me so I would go back to my bedroom.

Did you come to a border or point of no return?       I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was "sent back" against my will

Did scenes from the future come to you?       Scenes from my personal future           I think the radio/lamp was describing events from my future life, but I am not sure.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge or purpose?        Yes     The tall radio/lamp was trying to tell me something important, but I was too young to understand.

Discuss any changes that might have occurred in your life after your experience:   Large changes in my life  The event gave me a sense of purpose and removed my fear of death.  I am still afraid of OTHER people in my life dying, and I fear the process of dying, but I have no fear of death itself.  I KNOW that life continues after death.           

Did you have any changes in your values or beliefs after the experience that occurred as a result of the experience?    Yes     Although I am not sure what my beliefs were before the experience, I was so young, I know the event had a profound effect on me.  It made me intensely interested in religions, sprirituality, etc. and I became certain of an afterlife.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience?    Yes     I have premonitions, psychic dreams, telepathy etc. These become more common and intense the older I get.

Have you ever shared this experience with others?   Yes   I shared it with my parents the next day, but they thought I had a bad dream because I was sick, but as I persisted in telling the dream over the years, even they started to wonder if maybe it was something more.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?    No    

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:    Experience was definitely real    The experience was NOT dreamlike, it felt absolutely real.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience at the current time: Experience was definitely real          

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?           Yes     I think the experience made me a kinder person.

Have your religious beliefs/spiritual practices changed specifically as a result of your experience? Yes    I believe the experience made me intensely interested in religion and spirituality and I have experimented with many different religions.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience?  Yes    I have had other psychic experiences but not as intense as that first one.

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?    Yes   

Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you?     Just the intensity of it and its persistence in my memory.

Is there anything else that you would like to add about your experience?        I think it was an atypical NDE, possibly because of my age, those on the other side felt the need to use anything, even fear, to get me back into my physical body!  After all, I didn't even realize I had left it!