When I knew about the pregnancy, I didn't speak to anybody about it. Due to this, many and strong fears were building up, and a feeling of absolute despair.

I was praying, to be able to die, as I didn't see a way out, to be able to share my situation with parents or relatives. My conception about what I thought about myself, was dying.  I could see all my imprinting, and also the way they had been developing. My complete life proceeded in front of my inner eye like a movie. With this, I heard many voices and meanings of others. I felt like being locked in a box, helpless and without knowing how to get out.

Later I was surrounded with calmness, peace and safety. I very clearly felt the difference between my thought constructions, and the absolute "being". My consciousness, at this point of time of the experience,  found itself above my body. It was clear that I wanted to get back into my body. This experience clearly showed to me, that I am responsible for my happiness.

At that time I was on a banana plantation in Australia.

At the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event?   No 

Was the experience difficult to express in words?  Yes     Yes, it was as if trying to convey the beauty of a butterfly to somebody else. But for the other one to realize this beauty, he can only do it when he is seeing the butterfly.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?            in the afternoon

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness?      More consciousness and alertness than normal   I can describe it like a stronger awareness of myself and of the nature surrounding me.

Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.   before: unconscious view

during: conscious view

Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.   before: confusing

during: clearly

Did you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that your consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body?   No  

What emotions did you feel during the experience?   Joy  

Did you pass into or through a tunnel?   Yes   very fast upward movement

Did you see an unearthly light?   Yes   everything surrounding me seemed brighter

Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice?   I heard a voice I could not identify
It gave me infinite certainty in myself.

Did you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, etc.)?   Yes   It felt, as if Jesus was standing beside me like a friend.

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings?   No  

Did you become aware of past events in your life during your experience?   Yes  

Yes my whole life was scrolling in front of my inner eye. It was as if I was 'searching' for my authentic being, but could only find myself in my imprints.

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world?   No


Did time seem to speed up or slow down?   Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
First it seemed as if everything was scrolling very fast; then it seemed as if time stood still.

Did you suddenly seem to understand everything?   Everything about the universe
Everything made 'sense' on a new 'level'.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?   No
My body and the nature surrounding me, were one.

Did you come to a border or point of no return?   No


Did scenes from the future come to you?  Scenes from my personal future 
I saw myself, sharing joy with my fellow men.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness suggesting that there either is (or is not) continued existence after earthly life (�life after death�)?   Uncertain   I was  in contact with a 'feeling' respectively a consciousness of "everlasting being."

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that God or a supreme being either does (or does not) exist?   Uncertain     A clear awareness that there is 'more'.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that you either did (or did not) exist prior to this lifetime?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness that a mystical universal connection or unity/oneness either does (or does not) exist?   Yes   I was aware of a oneness.

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life�s meaning or purpose?   Yes  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding earthly life�s difficulties, challenges, or hardships?   No  

During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness regarding love?   Uncertain   We are love, and everything around us also.

During your experience, did you encounter any other specific information / awareness that you have not shared in other questions that is relevant to living our earthly lives?   Yes   Everything has a rhythm and is in harmony with nature (causal connections)

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge or purpose?   Yes   Yes, it felt as if I had been cut off, of the natural nature in me and around me.

What occurred during your experience included:   Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience   I had a religious 'knowledge' about the fact that we are one and not separated from God. Then I experienced the oneness.

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience?   I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience   I remember it more accurately, because it changed my life.

Discuss any changes that might have occurred in your life after your experience:   I started with studies and my accomplishments were better than I had anticipated.

One year later I started practicing Yoga and daily meditation.

I got balance into my life.

I started to support others, so they would love themselves more.

My experience directly resulted in:   Large changes in my life

Did you have any changes in your values or beliefs after the experience that occurred as a result of the experience?   Yes   It was as if a wall crashed, made of beliefs and values. This wall was not there anymore. In the first instance this was a scaring experience, because it had given me security. Then I perceived the freedom, linked to the crash of this wall.

Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience?   Yes   I can consciously perceive feelings of people.  

Have you ever shared this experience with others?   Yes  approximately one year later I started with this. It showed me, that it is my mission, to share my experience. As recently as one year ago I started to share in groups ("Sat Sang")

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?   Uncertain   I only knew the word.

What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:   Experience was probably not real   I was confused about what happened and could not comprehend it entirely.

What do you believe about the reality of your experience at the current time:   Experience was definitely real   In the last 6 years my life changed a lot.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?   Yes   I feel more open towards others and am also more authentic towards them.

Have your religious beliefs/spiritual practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?   Yes   I started to meditate.

At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience?   Yes   The experienced was often reactivated due to various encounters.  

Did the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?   Yes   Yes, the questionnaire is very detailed.

What could a national organization with an interest in near death experience (NDE) do that would be of interest to you?    Organize an event about near-death-experiences, where people concerned can talk.