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Abed's Experience

Experience description:   

It was about 10 O’clock in the morning. As usual, my ex-husband had come at around 7 am to pick up our daughter and take her to daycare. Strangely I didn’t wake up that day, even though I am a light sleeper. So I was home alone, sound asleep, and suddenly woke up with a jolt; “my god, what time is it? I am late for work, I must wake up my daughter”… but the apartment was silent. I was on my back with my head under a blanket. I uncovered my face, realized it must have been around 10 am and that my ex-husband must had took our daughter without waking me and gone to work. I proceeded to get up but to my surprise, I saw my body laying under the blanket. Fear swept over me, I was there but my face was still covered. I went to call for help but realized nobody would come knock at my door… I thought of my neighbor… what if by any chance she would come knock on my door? She could call the EMS and I could be saved, I didn’t want to die… but how would she know I was there? I was filled with despair; I could hear my heart beating very, very, very slow in my ears… the pulsations were getting more spaced out from one another. I didn’t want to die and knew that without help, I was done and time was pressing. Words cannot describe the distress and anguish… after a while my heart wasn’t beating anymore, all was happening very fast and then I felt myself being sucked in by a very powerful vacuum. I resisted but was powerless; I was like a light leaf being taken by the wind. I was afraid of crashing into the wall but went right through it. The speed was dizzying, I wanted to hang on to things but I didn’t have a body anymore. I found myself somewhere in the sky suspended in the air and saw my mother in her kitchen. She was baking bread…. We were not in good terms and knew she would be really hurt... I then understood I was dead.

There were moments when the vacuum didn’t have as much power…. I could float for a few seconds and it’s during those times I could see the scenes like the one with my mother and other ones but then, all of the sudden, the vacuum was powerful again and would suck me up with dizzying speed. I still remember, I didn’t want to die: I was not accepting it and was fighting it with all my strength. I saw sceneries and cities but at one point, the speed was once more dizzying and I found myself in a dark room. The speed was slowing down, there was a rectangular table, four men wearing white shirts were sitting around it. Like clones, they all had the same face and also had a scar on the left cheek. They were pretty chubby and were silently busying themselves making something with white sheets. They looked at me for a brief moment and went back to work. One man was standing: he was strong and tall. I asked him how to avoid being sucked in by the vacuum… I didn’t want to go… I wanted to stay. He took my hand and I cannot describe what I felt… it was warm, soft, a never ending love. I wanted one thing: stay there, holding his hand forever… peace and calm took over my body and I wasn’t scared anymore. It was as if I was drinking this love and wanted to keep drinking it but he withdrew his hand and gave me a look that meant I was not allowed to be there, it was not my time.  Once again I felt sucked in by the vacuum, went through walls and found myself in a hospital in another country. People were speaking a language I did not understand, maybe Scandinavian I am not sure. No one could see me, I tried to get their attention but to no avail… I was distraught. I saw a woman: she was wearing a surgical gown like the ones patients wear. She saw me… truly saw me… and she was staring at me. I understood that she had just passed away but she wasn’t being sucked in like me. I asked her “Do you see me?”. I didn’t want to go but this powerful force didn’t want to let go… I was sucked in again but this time I had an idea: I wondered if I would not fight it and just surrender, if I would come back to my body…. I took a chance. I recited a verse from the Quran and let go. I woke up with a jolt and I was literally choking. I wasn’t breathing well and my heart was beating very slowly but I was conscious and I was alive. I opened all the windows and the colors were so bright, the people so beautiful; I was filled with happiness. I was alive, I was alive…. No words can describe this experience, this anguish and this happiness. Thank you to the people who are reading me and give credibility to my story. I hope I am contributing to something good.

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words? Yes     The feelings

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?          Yes     I was home alone and no one would have noticed my distress.

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?    all the time

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?    More consciousness and alertness than normal

If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain:   all the time

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?  No      

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     No

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            despair, dizzying speed

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?          Yes     walls, barriers...etc

Did you see a light?           No      

Did you meet or see any other beings?           Yes     Four men around a table sewing white sheets, a men with amazing kindness, a lady in a hospital’s hallway. I didn’t know any of them. I must also say that at that time, I had no close family members that were deceased.

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?    No       Life is precious. We must do good, be loving and help others. I became a very compassionate and spend a lot of time and energy towards other people.

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No      

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?            Yes  Magnificent sceneries

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   Uncertain      Things were going too fast when I was being sucked in and normal when I wasn’t.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?     No      

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure? No      

Did you become aware of future events?       No

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?     Yes     premonitory dreams experience, voice from the sky, deep understanding of the human being, intuition, clairvoyance from Tarot reading that I only do for myself or my family.

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes     I spoke about it incessantly for days but I stopped because I thought I was making a fool of myself to other people’s eyes.
Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?    No      

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:          Experience was definitely real.    There is no doubt it was real and not a dream. I really came out of my body and then, came back to life

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?    When the being took my hand and I felt this unbelievable love.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:  Experience was definitely real. Deep.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?           Yes   I became more sensitive but I suffered a lot because I don’t allow myself to get even or hurt other people. Unfortunately, many people can’t stop hurting others by being jealous or with their ignorance. Despite all my best efforts, there are people who will not change and see in me someone who is too generous and can be used. I will keep helping, it is my mission on this Earth.  

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?            Uncertain      Actually, I am not a muslim. I did a serious spiritual search and Islam could not give me the answers I was looking for. My faith was unshakeable until I had another experience with a voice from the sky. I wanted to understand Islam in a logic way. I now believe in god but not in Islam.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No      

Is there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?        Life is wonderful and people are blind: they hurt each other while they could be happy instead.

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?         Uncertain      It’s a unique sensation, you must live it to understand.

Are there any other questions we could ask to help you communicate your experience?   Thank you.